not a New Year's resolution, yet a change in the way we live our lives.

my wife and i plan to incorporate a drastic lifestyle change. everything from our spending habits to our eating habits.

has anyone ever taken on such a change? what was the best and worst things you could have done during this time? were you successful? what would you recommend to assist? what would you recommend staying away from?

The best motivation is to threaten yourself with death or other high stakes.

Thats always one of the few ways to achieve success. Put up some very high stakes and don't be afraid to take great risks. Do not live in the future or the past. Alway be in the present. I would also reccommend staying as far away from indulgences as possible. One last thing would be constant reflection on what you have accomplished and what you want to achieve. Some people keep journals, personally, I like to go running (no matter what the weather.) The dramatic increase of oxygen to the brain allows you to think *very* clearly and you'll have epiphanies left and right (as soon as you get into your rythm.) A simple walk would also do. Anything where you take in all of the sights, smells and sounds of the outside. It triggers remote association in the brain, as well as divergent thinking which will help you achieve your goals.

My little suggestion would be to try and do a few changes at a time. Try 2 major changes now and see if you can adjust to them first. Then after a period of time , say 6 months, then do 2 more and so on. The more you try to do the easier it will be to fail. Just take it a little slower.

why do a few changes at a time when you can do all of them at once.

that way you are restricting yourself to less of a chance of failure becase you have put so much on the line.

But if you do just one at a time it would be easier to adjust to the change because to do one thing is easier than trying two things. Try and tie your shoes while your brushing your teeth and see if you can do it easily.

I would just say to be realistic and be honest with yourself about your limitations.

Also, when taking on a lot of changes at once, they can feel like one big change, if one aspect of it does not pan out, it could feel like the whole idea failed and it can be very discouraging.
Be sure to keep your perspective and be flexible to changes and adjustments.

all is going well. i have managed to quite all of my vices and start a new life.

I've devoted my time to analyzing people to the bone (see my occupation) . Interestingly enough, I find that I have a superior lifestyle and greater knowledge of the world than people several decades older than me.

i feel like ive changed to a foreign lifestyle everytime i get out of bed.

Hastein...... You say you "have a superior lifestyle to those decades older than you", can you elaborate on that.

hasty, come analyse me .......

Perhaps Dribbler has gotten his answer and left us. But I can't help wondering about the reason for this wholesale life change.

Cutting back a little on the booze or ganja, skipping over the mediocre tv shows to do more reading, studying or working a bit more diligently, looking for sensible ways to save money for a down payment on a house -- any of these goals can be accomplished without turning yourself into a different person. But this sounds like an attempt to be someone else.

Are you that unhappy with your life? Most of us only have a few weaknesses or character flaws. Underneath that we're pretty close to what we want to be and just need some tweaking to fulfill our destiny.

I would suggest that you sit down and do some major introspection. Whatever is bothering you this deeply may be more specific than you think and not require a complete overhaul of your personality. Even worse, it may be something that you haven't recognized (or haven't wanted to) and you're going off in the wrong direction.

Since there are two of you involved, the question is unavoidable: is this really a relationship problem? No one has ever solved a relationship problem by becoming a different person. No one!

Whatever you do, remember that moderation is always appropriate. Don't try to do too much too fast. Nobody knows himself that well!

Are you that unhappy with your life? Most of us only have a few weaknesses or character flaws. Underneath that we're pretty close to what we want to be and just need some tweaking to fulfill our destiny.

Hmm..on the surface, I'd agree with you. But most of us live on a foundation of false values and empty goals. Its possible that dribbler realized this and just wants to lead a more meaningful life. Meaning that nothing short of a complete overhaul will do.

I usually see these 'life changes' as a positive thing if the person is commited to creating a superior identity for themselves.