21 y/o virgin here

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by stateofmind, Mar 1, 2009.

  1. phlogistician Banned Banned

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    10,342
    Blah blah blah. Wasted words. Now, what did you mean when you asked 'what can be done about it'.

    Do you really think someone can be turned bisexual by one single experience in childhood?

    Or are you just now avoiding discussing some of the silly things you have said?
     
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  3. electrafixtion Registered Senior Member

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    You have no idea what you are talking about Phlog. You would do well to PRACTICE being a kind person and a better listener. Had you REALLY cared about the original poster's content, you would have detected their obvious uncertainties. There is no reference to bi-sexual absolutism via what this person is relating. There is just no merit in demeaning genuine good will by pretending to know what's best. No matter how self righteous and judgmental you may be feeling at the time. Why not simply offer what you personally feel would be a genuine helpful suggestion in context of the OP's concerns? If not, what are you REALLY doing within this thread to begin with anyway?
     
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  5. phlogistician Banned Banned

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    Still you dodge the issues.

    What did you mean when you asked 'what can be done about it'.

    Do you really think someone can be turned bisexual by one single experience in childhood?
     
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  7. stateofmind seeker of lies Valued Senior Member

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    Guys, I'm not trying to cure my sexuality. I have intimacy problems with ANYONE - male or female. If you want to debate whether homosexuals are nature or nurture, create a thread about it or post in the existing thousands that have come up before.
     
  8. Absane Rocket Surgeon Valued Senior Member

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    How's not jerking off going for you?
     
  9. electrafixtion Registered Senior Member

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    Go back to the part where I stated that you don't know what you are talking about. Since you are not quoting me verbatim, WTF are you talking about?

    C'mon Phlog, you are a million miles off base here.

    Show me where I stated that one event or experience can turn a person into a specific sexual orientation.
     
  10. phlogistician Banned Banned

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    You said;

    And there must have been a trigger for these fantasies, so ultimately, you are hinging everything on a very small influence.
     
  11. electrafixtion Registered Senior Member

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    949

    Not even close Phlog. I am using that as a reference point with respect to discerning early instinct based pivotal mental process. Purely mechanical. There is no hint of me suggesting that singular events induce sexual orientation. None at all.
     
  12. takandjive Killer Queen Registered Senior Member

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    2,361
    A friend of mine was 22 when he lost his virginity. Truthfully, it was the least of his problems. He also went through a period of thinking he was bisexual, but found out he was straight. The good news is, you don't have to slap a title on it. If you meet someone who wants to have safe, sane consensual sex and you want to also, great. If not, also fine.

    I slept with my friend and he lost his virginity this way. It messed up the friendship, but I think we're both glad he's a bit more "in the mainstream now." Here are the answers he wanted to questions you didn't ask:

    1) The sex was okay, passably good, even.

    2) Don't sleep with someone who's seeing someone else. It's just messy.

    3) Be honest about all things if you want to sleep with someone; if you do/don't want to do something, how you feel about things/the person/relationships, just spit it out.

    Hey, if someone has the cahones to ask, I'd tell them to get bent. That's no one's business but you and your partner's. And frankly, I don't think many people think virginity makes someone more sexually desirable. If someone I haven't intended on bedding tells me about their conquests or lack of, I'm pretty turned off.

    My suggestion is go have fun. The best sexual relationships I've had are because I wasn't worrying.

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

    Sex is easy to find; good sex is about doing what's right for you and not worrying about being judged.
     
  13. stateofmind seeker of lies Valued Senior Member

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    Thank you! Great advice!
     
  14. pluto2 Banned Valued Senior Member

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    I will probably be a lonely and kissless virgin forever and that's definitely not by choice.

    Hell I can't even get a single date let alone a kiss from a girl.

    My prolonged sexlessness is making me depressed and sometimes I even consider suicide as an option.

    What really scares me is that no one will care for me when I'm old.

    People who marry and have children have their spouse or children who care about them when they're sick and infirm in old age and can no longer take care of themselves.

    But I will probably will have no one to care about me when I'm old, sick and can no longer take care of myself.

    I just wish that I will die young so I won't have to endure sexlessness and extreme loneliness into old age.
     
  15. Kittamaru Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Adieu, Sciforums. Valued Senior Member

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    pluto2 - seek help from a therapist. Nobody here can help you with whatever the root of this kind of mindset is... and that mindset is going to drive away most people that might be interested in you.

    Before you can be happy with a spouse/mate/significant other, you should be able to be happy by yourself - otherwise, you are co-dependent, and that will drive people away (or worse, make it incredibly easy for them to abuse you).
     
  16. spidergoat pubic diorama Valued Senior Member

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    Why not?
     
  17. tablariddim forexU2 Valued Senior Member

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    Some people are just extremely shy, they might even have a spot of Aspergers. I'm just wondering but does Pluto 2 fell that he has love to offer or is his sole worry that he won't have anyone to look after him when he's old? Is he a person who is constantly 'mothered/mollycoddled?'
     
  18. spidergoat pubic diorama Valued Senior Member

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    Indeed, I have aspergers too, but I never wonder why I can't get a date. Usually it's because I don't ask. Or I don't want to date that person. Other than that, even unattractive people can date other unattractive people. Or an unattractive person only wants to date attractive people. I mean there is someone for everyone, right?
     
  19. tablariddim forexU2 Valued Senior Member

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    Yes, there is someone for everyone. You just have to give that someone a chance but I think your motives can't be selfish like, 'I just want someone to fuck regularly and they can look after me in old age'
     
  20. spidergoat pubic diorama Valued Senior Member

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    I would ask Pluto2 how many girls he has asked out this month?
     
  21. pluto2 Banned Valued Senior Member

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    I have asked out tons of girls but I am always getting rejected or ignored.

    Lets face it. I'm just too ugly to be desired by any girl.

    I'm also becoming increasingly worried about my future.

    I am at an age which I should already have had at least 1 girlfriend (or at least a date), a stable career and my own apartment but I don't have any of these things and I have to say that the future is looking incredibly bleak and hopeless for me.

    If my life will not improve in the next few years I will probably have to consider suicide as the only realistic option.
     
    Last edited: Dec 2, 2017
  22. sculptor Valued Senior Member

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    8,466
    ask a girl out?
    huh?
    wut?

    I do not recall ever "asking a girl out" as an introductory conversation.
    Mostly, I just talked and listened and let things flow as they would.
    Usually, if that led to a deeper relationship, we would just do things together(sex included)

     
  23. pluto2 Banned Valued Senior Member

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    I also can't stand my parents.

    My parents know that I am in financial and serious health troubles yet they still keep controlling and protecting me.

    I want to have my own life and my own career and my own home and my own salary but my parents won't let me be independent and live the life that I want.

    What my parents don't get is that I'm not a child anyone and I don't need protection.
     

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