Pre marital Sex - Why or Why not?

My point exactly. I dont see why Rex or Bells disagree with this.

 

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Time to lighten the mood a little:

Two cowboys are out on the range, talking about their favorite sex
positions. One says, "I think I enjoy the rodeo position the best."

"I don't think I have ever heard of that one," says the other cowboy.
"What is it?"

"Well," the first cowboy replied, "it's where you get
your girlfriend down on all fours and you mount her from behind,
and then you reach around and cup each one of her breasts in your
hands, and then you whisper in her ear, 'Boy, these feel just like
your sisters' ...and then you try to hold on for 8 seconds!"

 

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Ok, thats fine. This is just what I think right now - its not a rigid rule, I will modify it if required in a relationship later on.

 

Who said anything about one person? Between 100% monogamy and casual sex there's a whole world out there.

 

I don't really disagree with that, as I was arguing against premarital sex being off the table. As I said, sex is better within a relationship.

That said, having more sex with multiple partners (for clarity, all of whom might be partners with whom one is very serious) does confer some benefits too. Limiting sexual partners limits health risk (which can be effectively limited in other ways too, though) and confers the benefit of a sense of increased intimacy with those you do have sex with.

My personal opinion is that that boost in intimacy somewhat minor relative to the benefits of being a skilled sexual partner, and that skill comes from experience. I'm sure that varies from person to person, but most couples don't dwell on the number of partners one had in prior relationships, so that number, be it high or low, is easy to set aside for most people (plus, many if not most people lie about that number for one reason or another).

None of which is to say that anyone should necessarily maximize the number of sexual partners, but it does suggest countervailing considerations that should be considered.

 

You're just being cowardly.

You are willing to kill and die in the name of sex, but you refuse to discuss how and why.

Yeah, totally the mark of an intelligent person.

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It depends on what one's values are.

How can two people be sexually incompatible, but be compatible in other ways? It is not possible.

 

LOL - That's funny!

 

You have just described every other relationship that humans enter into.
The suggestion is that unless people are sexually compatible that they can't be compatible in other ways.

The English language provides many opportunities for ambiguous entertainment.

 

So you find it meaningful that two people, regardless of their values and goals in life, ought to go and have sex, and if they find they are "sexually compatible," they will be compatible in every other way - even if one is a Nazi and the other a Jew, or one a Republican and the other a Democrat etc.?

 

Wynn,

Your questions do not resonate with my thought processes.

Calling me unintelligent, cowardly and Ms. Pokerface does not incline me toward investing considerable time and thought in debating your remarks.

There is an old saying, "You will catch more flies with honey than with vinegar."

 

Your reading comprehension seems to have deteriorated lately... Where did anyone even imply that being sexually compatible makes people compatible in every other way? Seriously, this makes even less sense than your previous assertion that it's impossible to be compatible in other ways but sexually incompatible...

 

I am a guy. Many of my best friends are also guys. I am heterosexual, though, therefore my guy friends and I are NOT sexually compatible yet we ARE compatible in other ways.

So, clearly, it is possible.

Moreover, I have been in relationships with women to whom I was attracted where we had an emotional connection but were sexually incompatible (because we had different preferences regarding styles, specific activities, frequency, degrees of sexual experimentation, etc.).

 

That's not what I thought was being said. But do you have a problem with people who are attracted to each other having sex while they find out how many other things they have in common? I actually think filling out an accurate profile with a few pictures of yourself and let companies like Match, display best selections based on your profile. It may not be a perfect system but it does a lot of filtering for you. Not many people will fill out a profile and pay a service if they are not ready for a relationship. That alone is a big plus.

 

You actually use Internet dating? I've always thought there was something rather desperate about using things like that. Admittedly if PB and I broke up or she died I wouldn't even know where to start to attract someone else or know if they were interested so *shrug*. We have been together so long I wouldn't even know where to start dating again

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A lot of people don't have a lot of time or energy to get out and look for a mate like they did when they were young and somewhat inexperienced. Most are working a full time job and may even have kids to watch and take care of. Maybe they have lot's of friends that can help them meet people, but I'm betting that's not the case for most people. If you are a middle aged guy such as yourself and for whatever reason you become single again and want to find a new relationship. How much time do you have to invest in that endeavor and where do you go to find a selection of interested and potentially compatible women that will appeal to you? I bet your not really thinking of finding a bar for the older crowd are you and if your not very religious, churches are out. So where do you look?

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Umm im currently at uni and studying to be a paramedic and therefore around nurses, paramedics and cops all day. I would HOPE that i wouldn't have any problem meeting people, its the thought of DATING which scares the hell out of me

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BTW that does mean im working shift work with all the issues that comes with. That and what we actually see for a living means its better to date in house with people who understand why when you have spent a day cleaning up a kid splattered across a wall because mummy doesnt know what a seatbelt is and its 7:00 and you have just FINISHED work, its nice to have a partner (or a date) who understands this rather than someone whos idea of a hard day is an annoying customer or a computer virus

 

For you, you might be right, I think a good women is where ever you can find her, and good matches are found at work. It's actually a fairly high percentage.