'net Morality

On an Internet forum such as this one, how much do you owe your fellow community members?

Once upon a time, no one on the net really cared about each other or got involved in each others lives, but with the advent of lots of people having computer Internet access and social networking sites becoming the norm... how much of a moral responsibility do you have to your fellow net-izens?

Is it okay to lie and make people believe you are someone that you are not, just to get them to care for you? For instance, if you tell a guy who is single and looking for a relationship that you are 5'6" and 125, but you are really 5'4" and more like 165, can you hope that he will just accept the person that you actually are or is this form of lying immoral and indecent? Is the general anonymity of the Internet something that gives people license to lie straight to your face? Where is the line, or is it all just gray smatter?

How about if you just need a little attention in your life, so you create a persona and fake an illness just so that people seem interested in how you are doing? Is that moral? What if you start making up all sorts of stories about who you are, making you so very interesting that people really start getting involved in your life and you realize that you are caught in so many lies that you have to do something drastic? Is it okay to fake your own death/suicide and then reinvent yourself as someone else to keep yourself involved with the community? You are obviously hurting other people who did care about you with your lies, but can you justify that by saying to yourself "Well, I'll be there to support them, since I came back after I faked my own suicide" and still sleep at night?

Is it okay to cheat on a spouse you are miserable with? What about cybersex... is that cheating? There are real people on both ends, and unless you are paying for it, someone else is vested in it as well. Unless of course, they are also lying and cheating... right?

Where do we draw the line on what we owe to one another, as these are real emotions you are treading on? Do we owe anyone our morality and respect, or has it become too easy for people to "fake it" and get all that they want out of us emotionally?

Do you think that the Internet has made us less moral, and more dishonest on a global scale? Think about how often you lie to your fellow community members. Think about how much your persona on these forums differs from the person you are in the real world. Would people you know in real life be surprised at some of the posts/opinions/threads you've started here?

Has the Internet allowed us to create a world of complete make believe where morality is all gray and you can justify even the most heinous behaviors depending on what community you get involved in? Is the global community binding us together, or making it easier for us to develop sociopaths who have little to no conscience and no real sense of how what he/she does affects the real people on the other side of the monitor?

Let's tackle the death/suicide angle first. Do you think it's okay for people to do this to a community? Why or why not?

 

Log in or Sign up to hide all adverts.

No, it's selfish, attention seeking, and plays on real suicides unfairly.

However, this thing is a spectrum with grey areas in the middle.

Adding one or two fictional inches to your height is pretty harmless. I wouldn't blame someone who has an issue about their height for kidding themselves they're 5'8 instead of 5'6.

I guess if someone forms an emotional bond with you and you abuse it, that's when it becomes "wrong" instead of merely annoying.

 

Log in or Sign up to hide all adverts.

Actually I haven't had to barrow anything yet.

What net did you live on?

The same you do any one.

Suicide is ultimately a personal decision and one which cannot be appealed.

 

Log in or Sign up to hide all adverts.

Why is it gray, when there is another human being at the other end of the line. A thinking, feeling person who has a fair assumption (gullible and naive as it may be) that the person they are interacting with is telling the truth? In all fairness, people don't expect other people to lie to them on the street or in person. Why is it okay to talk about immoral issues as well, and find support and encouragement to do those things somewhere on the 'net?

Do you think it's okay for them to lie and get people to like them? I mean, to really care about them, and then just disappear? Is it made worse by coming back as someone else to connect with all the same people just under a different name?

One or two inches, and 40 pounds... is a little different than just an inch or two. How little a lie is okay? How big?

Swarm,

I wasn't talking about whether suicide itself is right/wrong. I was asking if faking it on a community like this where people interact and care about you for sometimes years, is immoral. What about coming back and "haunting" the forum under another persona?

So do you think that with all these social networks and communities, we are getting more immoral and making excuses for immoral behavior? Is it getting easier to lie and live in a world that isn't really true? Is this why people get addicted to places like facebook and myspace and entrenched in games like WoW and EQ? Because it's easy to be someone that you are not? I have real life relationships with several people I've played mmo's with. I talk on the phone with them and they come to visit, etc. I've even hosted a party for a group of people I've met online. I'm a seasoned net-izen.

Lately I've been noticing more and more people lying to get by. Creating grand stories and huge drama's just to get attention, and when they burn that out... the try to go out with a bang and create more drama. Faked deaths, faked suicides, faked attacks by boyfriends and spouses, faked hardships so they can get attention and/or money. It seems to be getting more prevalent and I don't understand how these people think that it's okay.

 

nothing
the question is how much do you owe yourself?
i think most avail themselves of the relative anonymity to explore themselves, ideas, to a degree that might not be afforded to them in real life.

i see more honesty than not in cyberspace

one can switch off sci but cannot, the neighbor.
unconstrained thought vs the guarded and measured response

 

So do you think it's okay for someone to get others involved in their life and to care about them, and then fake their own suicide? You think that's moral?

 

I live by the philosophy that you lie it will eventually come back and bite you in the ass in the case of a cheating spouse in the nuts and or other regions of the male and female anatomy if you get my point. I have always said what I meant and meant what i have said always and forever no take backs.

 

How do you know that people are lying? That people are faking their deaths, suicides, attack by boyfriends & spouses? And who here have taking money from others? Do you have any evidence, or are you just assuming all those things?

 

why would i even bother to care or comment on instances of aberrant conduct that is obviously far from the norm?

 

I don't see the difference, those who are "politically correct" are still politically correct, those who lead double lives still lead double lives [they just conceal different parts in different places"], those who are not afraid to speak out are probably the same in real life.

People are just less restrained because the "audience" is irrelevant.

 

And as far as creating new persona, I used to post under user name "inzomnia", but I create new user name because people in real life (in uni) found out my inzomnia account, and I don't feel comfortable anymore to post with that account. However, all people in my friends list in sciforums (68 users) know about it because I mentioned it in inzomnia's visitor message board (that I change my username to kira). Sometimes, my friends (e.g. Shorty) still call me as Inzomnia in the board.

Let's go back to the question. Life and death is a serious matter. How do you know people are faking their deaths/suicides? If you are not careful, it may turn into a character assassination.

 

How do you know they are fake?

 

kira,

I'm not talking about people on sciforums or anything like that, I am speaking in general terms. I've seen it happen, known that people are faking it (they post on other sites or update their facebook pages when they are supposedly dead) and other things. No character assassination, just asking broad general questions. Not accusing or blaming anyone, we are talking about 'net morality as a whole.

S.A.M.

Why is the audience irrelevant? Because you can't touch/see them?

 

No because its invisible. Ever give a speech in an auditorium thats well lit vs act in an auditorium where all the light is focused on the stage?

Do you know why the lighting is different?

 

Ah, ok.. that's relieving, then! Recently there was a member here who committed suicide, so I thought that you refer to that member. My appology.

 

I understand the concept, but there are still real people in the audience. Are you saying that personal perception is all that matters, and that you have no responsibility to the people you are talking to just because you can't see them?

 

Mostly I think its because there is no reason. Its the internet, if you take it seriously enough to impact your real life then you need to take another look at your life. Its where you exchange ideas and explore possibilities. Do you think people don't wear the same masks in real life? Fake suicides, fake jobs, fake friendships? Its a medium of interaction, it beats a book club or a local political forum. Use it without losing it.

 

The amount you owe can be computed to a very exact number:

Zilch....

 

i am totally different off the internet in that i am very refined and quiet because i really have no interest in making a spectakle of myself. i dont care or expect if people are honest about who they are or if they are lying to me on the internet because i am not a child so i dont really care or think about it/ if someone is more strange than i care to have anything to do with then i just dont respond to them. i also think the fact that i really dont want to know these peole any better than just responding on a screen helps this.

 

Good point. How many of the people here you talk to would you really be comfortable sitting across from in real life?