alternative spanking methods.

this topic is an off shoot of the 'spanking lowers iq points' thread

what it is intended for is alternative means to discipline you child that does not involve spanking..

post your stories about when you spanked your child (or current situations involving a desire to spank) and seek advice on how you can handle the situation without spanking..

if you wanna debate whether spanking is acceptable or not use this thread.'spanking lowers iq points'

 

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That does not involve spanking? Hmmmm, beating, hitting, whipping..burning with a cigarette, throw boiling water into the child's face...etc.
Now now..that would be called abuse, wouldn't it? So lets retry it...

Talking with the 4 year old about how what it did was wrong, and very bad and if it would do it again Evil Santa wouldn't give them any presents for Christmas. How lovely...those psychological games are.

Whinging child is lying on the floor in a supermarket, because it wants a candy but mommy said no. Mommy tells child to stop making a fuzz about it. Child proceeds with whining, and crawling on floor. Mommy tries to start a conversation with child - "son, these candies are bad for your health, and bad for my purse, and because mommy loves you muchos, she doesn't want to give you a candy. So be a good kiddo, and stop with the whining."
Child ignores mum, and proceeds with bad behaviour. Mum rethinks, and just simply walks away, while completely ignoring the kid. Kid proceeds with whining until it notices that mommy is not here any more. WHERE IS MOMMY?! Panic. Child cries even more, and starts uncontrollably running through shop on the search for mommy. Awww...could have a traumatic effect on the kid.





Oh, I'm awaiting some decent contributions by those who think that spanking is bad, and equals with assault and beating. Now, it's your glorious moment to show off your non-spanking-assault-beating parenting skills!

 

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well, I was gonna post some of my methods, but then I read Psycho's rant.
Why bother if this is an attack thread and not an exchanging of ideas?

 

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Question: Are the alternative methods used for a child that has never been spanked or one that has already been spanked and now the parent is trying to fix the problem?

Big difference here.

 

But, not a pointless rant. It demonstrates quite clearly he's not interested in hearing other methods and would rather just beat the kid into submission.

 

Depends on the child. Some don't need to be punished in a literal since, you can just tell them to stop and they do, don't even ask why. Some kids respond to emotions, like telling them that they are making you sad and if I remember correctly from high school many of my classmates agreed that the worse thing their parents could do to them was say they were "disappointed in them". But some kids don't give a damn about how you feel so that naturally wouldn't work on them. Some people use timeouts, but I don't find them to be very effective for many kids. However I do find over correction and/or humiliation do be highly effective methods for kids who are really unruly. But some kids are beyond even those methods, which usually means they are being purposely obstinate. They can be ignored unless they're doing dangerous things. Then I believe you have to be physical with them before they hurt someone, I had to lock one kid in a closet and later tie him up because he had gotten out of hand. He then destroyed the closet couldn't wait to get rid of that spoiled brat.

 

I love this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpSfThUv_pc

 

You keep making false arguments by providing generalized examples that have no explanation. You are comparing apples and oranges. How do the kids get unruly in the first place?

 

Please tell me you are not serious!
That will do more damage to a child than spanking it.
Anyone who has a kid that "requires" this, CAUSED it in the first place by being a crappy parent.

You should be in prison.
This is why children shouldn't be parents.
Whose child was this? Was it yours? Are you a babysitter? Do you, God forbid, run a day care?

 

c'mon orly
lets hear em

/attack mode

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Way to misinterpret things, Orleander. As usually. This isn't an attack thread, nor is my post an attack. Don't use me as an excuse for not sharing with us your good methods of child rearing.
Or could it just simply be that you just don't have any methods at all with which you could show off?

 

How should I know I didn't raise them. That's just what I used to deal with.

 

It is interesting that those who were so fervently arguing against spanking being used as a discipline method haven't yet provided us with alternatives to it. Very interesting.

 

Are you calling me a child? Why?
I was not allowed to hit other people's kids, so over correction and humiliation were effective tools I had at my disposal. We were playing some kind of obstacle course game and the team with the most girls came in last. So a boy on that team made a sexist comment so I told him he could be his own team the next time around and he came in dead last. He kept his sexist comments to himself ever since. It worked. :shrug:

Well bestow me with the infinite wisdom of an adult, and tell me how you deal with a kid who went on a rampage and attacked not only his peers, but the adults in the room as well, with a weapon (a baseball bat). He wasn't two he was ten and a big ten year old at that (5'3 and weighed more than me). I was the one that managed to get the bat away, but then he punched me in the stomach and bit my arm hard enough to draw blood. So yeah I pushed him in the closet and when he started ransacking the closet, my boss told me to tie him up so he didn't hurt himself.

 

What happened with that kid later? Psychological help? Pretty crazy. :bugeye:

 

Don't know, after his parents paid everyone's medical bills, that was the last I saw of him. He definitely had anger management issues and lots of personal problems like his brother's death and father's extramarital affair, but we all have problems beating innocent 1st graders with bats is not okay.

 

Nothing you can say could possibly justify such deplorable chld abuse.

The ONLY time physical restraint of a child to such a degree should be considered, should be under close medical supervision in the proper environment if that child is an immediate threat to himself and others - not locked in a fucking closet and tied up.
What kind of place do you work at? Whose children are these? Do the parents know what you did?

If I knew who you were, I would do everything I could to get the place shut down, have your boss lose whatever license he may have and try and press criminal charges.
If it was MY kid, I don't know how well I would be able to control myself.
It is inexcuable.
He's TEN YEARS OLD. You obviously got the bat from him. If you still felt he was an immediate threat, you should have called the authorities. Not only to protect the kid and others from what he might do, but to protect the kid from whatever situation he is in that causes this kind of behavior. That kid needs serious attention and I would be gravely concerned about his situation at home.

 

No it's not, but it still doesn't justify the actions taken - and the lack of action taken by nobody getting the authorities involved.

 

one_raven, calm down, okay? That kid apparently WAS a threat to everyone and himself. There probably wasn't anyone around at that time who could provide them with "close medical supervision" to calm the kid down. The kid wasn't just using a bat, but apparently also biting people in its surrounding. That is a threat. What can you do in such an immediate situation?
...

So, back to topic: What other methods than spanking to use in disciplining children? Something that doesn't require a little physical roughness.

 

No.

First of all, I don't see how he was a threat to himself, but locking him in a closet could actually MAKE that escalate to that point. Do you think locking a kid in a closet would calm him down? It would make him even MORE rageful and a bigger threat to himself.
Secondly, he was TEN YEARS OLD. Hold him.
Hold him to keep him from the other children, take him into a different room and call the authorities.

They obviously didn't call anyone either!

Keep him away from the other kids and call the autorities. Certainly not lock him in a closet and TIE HIM UP!! That will accomplish nothing but damage a troubled kid even worse.