Worst Cooking Moments

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by darksidZz, Sep 27, 2008.

  1. zenobia Registered Member

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    I prefer the lurking lifestyle.
    I'd like to say the sweat running into my crack right now is from you're charming statements, but it's probably just the fact it's about 40 degrees in my room.
    If you were more observant you would have noticed a myspace link.

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  3. Steve100 O͓͍̯̬̯̙͈̟̥̳̩͒̆̿ͬ̑̀̓̿͋ͬ ̙̳ͅ ̫̪̳͔O Valued Senior Member

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    I burnt my toast one day as well.

    And I put whole milk on my cereal once.
     
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  5. Zakariya04 and it was Valued Senior Member

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    i rarely cook cos i am shit at cooking!!

    i do ahev a couple of disasters though but cant remember them though
     
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  7. MacGyver1968 Fixin' Shit that Ain't Broke Valued Senior Member

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    I've burned a few things..but my best story about kitchen mess-ups, has to with cleaning the kitchen.

    My best friends parents went out of town for a week, and were due back to arrive, my friend and I were franticly cleaning their house.

    I loaded up the dishwasher, and looked under the sink for soap. Since my friend's mom was an "Amway" dealer, all I was confused with the Amway products, and ended up using regular liquid dish soap (like Dawn or Joy) instead of the dishwasher soap...and totally filled the cup in the dishwasher with the stuff.

    Needless to say, it was like something off the fucking "Brady Bunch", as mountains of foam came pouring out of the dishwasher. We couldn't help but laugh trying to clean up the huge mess.
     
  8. Steve100 O͓͍̯̬̯̙͈̟̥̳̩͒̆̿ͬ̑̀̓̿͋ͬ ̙̳ͅ ̫̪̳͔O Valued Senior Member

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    My worst kitchen cock up was jumping out of my skin when a big crow flew into the window while I was holding a pot of stew.

    Beef stew went all over the place and took ages to clean up.
     
  9. Spud Emperor solanaceous common tater Registered Senior Member

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    A mate of mine tells a story of his pet cockatiel which landed on the side of a saucepan, overbalanced and got fried, literally!
     
  10. Challenger78 Valued Senior Member

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    I once gave a bunch of cadets, Ammonia instead of cordial, and was puzzled when they didn't drink it.

    I think I don't give people enough credit at that time.. Either that or I wasn't thinking straight.
     
  11. Challenger78 Valued Senior Member

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    I did that with aluminium foil.
     
  12. Steve100 O͓͍̯̬̯̙͈̟̥̳̩͒̆̿ͬ̑̀̓̿͋ͬ ̙̳ͅ ̫̪̳͔O Valued Senior Member

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    You can teach them to talk, but they'll never understand when you tell them of the dangers of frying pans.

    Sometimes I heat things up on side plates and sometimes they spark because they have gold trim.
     
  13. CarpetDiem Burnin' hours, season days Registered Senior Member

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    Worst cooking moment was camping with a few mates some years back. We had all just bought these brand new nylon tents and erected them and then sat down to admire our purchases and our efforts with a few beers around the campfire, and one of my stupid mates had earlier placed four cans of baked beans directly in the fire, which as you guessed expoded, not before us fleeing frantically from the exploding hot bullets which pierced some of our clothes, brusied our egos and all of our tents! We got no food, no sleep as it rained hard all that night; we nearly killed our mate next morning

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  14. lucifers angel same shit, differant day!! Registered Senior Member

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    i havent had any bad cooking moments, i ahve always been able to cook, it was somthing that i was able to pick up when i was younger, i still cook every day and i love it, its fun and somtimes its relaxing
     
  15. Steve100 O͓͍̯̬̯̙͈̟̥̳̩͒̆̿ͬ̑̀̓̿͋ͬ ̙̳ͅ ̫̪̳͔O Valued Senior Member

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    What a tit.
    I always used to cook them in the tin, but at least I would open them first.
     
  16. CarpetDiem Burnin' hours, season days Registered Senior Member

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    Yeah, your right; you cooked it the right way, although you can boil beans too. Yes for a day my mate was a half wit twit tit

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  17. Steve100 O͓͍̯̬̯̙͈̟̥̳̩͒̆̿ͬ̑̀̓̿͋ͬ ̙̳ͅ ̫̪̳͔O Valued Senior Member

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    My first major disaster happened just now.

    I Decided to have a cheese, ham and Branston sarnie.

    I put some toast on the go, slice my cheddar, and slice some ham.
    Toaster pops, so I add the cheese and ham, go to the cupboard for the Branston Pickle and there was none.

    Disaster.
     
  18. MacGyver1968 Fixin' Shit that Ain't Broke Valued Senior Member

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    Never ever...ever turn on the blender on high speed without the top on.
     
  19. Steve100 O͓͍̯̬̯̙͈̟̥̳̩͒̆̿ͬ̑̀̓̿͋ͬ ̙̳ͅ ̫̪̳͔O Valued Senior Member

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    My uncle did that with ice. Bad idea.
     
  20. lucifers angel same shit, differant day!! Registered Senior Member

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    its funny though, mt daughter once put and egg in the microwave and blew it up, she wanted an egg sandwhich and thought that was the best way
     
  21. lucifers angel same shit, differant day!! Registered Senior Member

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    how can nayone fuck up pasta, along with rice they are the easiest thing to cook
     
  22. Steve100 O͓͍̯̬̯̙͈̟̥̳̩͒̆̿ͬ̑̀̓̿͋ͬ ̙̳ͅ ̫̪̳͔O Valued Senior Member

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    2,346
    Translated to: YOU FUCK UP EVERYTHING YOUR STILL DANCING
     
  23. CarpetDiem Burnin' hours, season days Registered Senior Member

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    383
    Now listen LA, in economic parlance, women hae a comparative advantage in cooking pasta and rice (no matter how easy it sems to all and sundry), just as men have the same comparative advantage in orienteering!

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