essex girl

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by Muslim, May 16, 2007.

  1. Muslim Immortal Valued Senior Member

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    an Essex girl has a car crash and an ambulance arrives.the paramedic asks 'how many fingers have i got up?'the girl replies- oh no i think im paralised too.
     
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  3. one_raven God is a Chinese Whisper Valued Senior Member

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  5. mikenostic Stop pretending you're smart! Registered Senior Member

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    I'm assuming that 'Essex girls' are the English equivalent to America's blondes?
     
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  7. Oli Heute der Enteteich... Registered Senior Member

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    Essex girl's idea of protected sex?
    In a bus shelter.
     
  8. one_raven God is a Chinese Whisper Valued Senior Member

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    Pretty much, just a bit more ...

    Let's say "Blonde white trash".
     
  9. Oli Heute der Enteteich... Registered Senior Member

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    An Essex girls' favourite wine?
    "You never take me shopping"
    (Admittedly an aural rather than visual joke).
     
  10. Oli Heute der Enteteich... Registered Senior Member

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    Why do Essex girls like BMWs?
    It's the only car they can spell.
    (VW would be easier, but, WTF, it's a joke).
     
  11. one_raven God is a Chinese Whisper Valued Senior Member

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    Try getting one to spell Volkswagen!
     
  12. Oli Heute der Enteteich... Registered Senior Member

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    With her mouth full?

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

     
  13. mikenostic Stop pretending you're smart! Registered Senior Member

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    How do blondes turn on the light in the morning?
    By opening the car door.

    What do blondes say after sex?
    Are you guys all on the same team?

    What do blondes and turtles have in common?
    When they are on their backs, they're fucked.

    What do blondes use panties for?
    Ankle warmers

    If you threw a blond and a brunette out of an airplane which would hit the ground first?
    The brunette because the blond would stop and ask for directions.
     
  14. Oli Heute der Enteteich... Registered Senior Member

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    There was the "true" story about the blonde/ Essex girl that went to the doctor because she was putting weight on very rapidly.
    The first thing the doc said was "Do you have an active sex life?".
    "No"
    "okay, we'll run some tests"
    pause
    "You're pregnant. I thought you said you didn't have an active sex life?"
    "I don't. I just lay there and let my boyfriend get on with it"
     
  15. Muslim Immortal Valued Senior Member

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    2,523
    So funny.

    Theres a Jew joke too. How do you fit 5 Nazis and 5 Jews in a WV Beetle? 3 Nazis in the back 2 Nazis in the front, and 5 Jews in the ashtray.
     

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