XB-70 Valkyrie

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XB-70 Valkyrie
Top Speed: 3,300 km/h or mach 3
Nuclear Payload: 13,200 kg (that will kick some ass on the enemy)
Number built in America: 2 (3rd prototype was cancelled)
Number built by USLR: 1,000,000 in full production model

No, not a robot.


Possibly the best strategic bomber prototype of all time, it was introduced in 1964, the XB-70 Valkyrie finally gave the Soviet Union something to worry about coming from the west. However, just when America was finished working out all of the bugs on the project, the retard who was in charge of the National Defence cancelled the project. The Soviet Union celebrated to this good news with vodka and ice cream. Some years later, the USLR had developed an aircraft that was so coincidentally similar to the XB-70, that they simply named that aircraft the XB-70. It performed so well, that it is still serving to this very day in the USLR-East Korean War.

Service in the USLR-East Korean War

Every day, the XB-70 performs extensive ground bombings against the EKs. Its weapons range from AWG-53B Penis Cruise-Missiles, to Dog-Shit bombs and Nuclear Dog-Shit Bombs. Even though 1,000,000 Xb-70s have been built, there has often been a shortage of pilots. This results in the Co-pilots remotely flying a seperate bomber to maximize an attack pattern's destructivness.


The XB-70 project was started by Mockheed-Lartin, a competitor of Lockheed-Martin, back in 1964.

XB-70 Valkyrie

The experimental test model.

B-70A Valkyrie

The production model currently in full service with the UAF.

B-70B Uber Valkyrie

The famed B-70 that Exeter brags can dock with the ISS.