Awkward conversations..

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by Challenger78, Nov 27, 2009.

  1. Challenger78 Valued Senior Member

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    So.. um...

    Anyways. Have you ever had a plan/ or a certain way of breaking the ice and actually talking to the guy, or bailing out of a conversation ?

    Or have you been fond of faux pas ?
     
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  3. Orleander OH JOY!!!! Valued Senior Member

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    I've never had a problem breaking the ice. I just say 'hi' and introduce myself. To get out of an awkward situation, I excuse myself and go to the restroom
     
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  5. shorty_37 Go! Canada Go! Registered Senior Member

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    Talking to what guy? Are you talking about random strangers on the street? Someone you see at a bar/club?

    Usually I am not good at initiating a conversation with a stranger, depends on the circumstances.

    I have found myself in many awkward conversations and situations (mainly when I was dating) I usually made up some excuse that I have to leave for whatever reason.
     
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  7. Lori_7 Go to church? I am the church! Registered Senior Member

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    i'm pretty straight-forward. if i have a reason to talk to someone, i just walk up to them and tell them what that reason is. if someone is making me uncomfortable, then i tell them so.
     
  8. draqon Banned Banned

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    I look them directly in the eyes and continue the awkward situation even further, it gives me great strength to feel the awkwardness grow in another man/woman, their insecurities collapsing in them one after another. They usually back off and can't handle it. And than I smile.
     
  9. Bebelina kospla.com Valued Senior Member

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    It's embarrasing having to use actual spoken words to explain a situation.
     
  10. Orleander OH JOY!!!! Valued Senior Member

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    good point. I'd rather express myself in dance as well

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  11. shorty_37 Go! Canada Go! Registered Senior Member

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    lmao.........
     
  12. Lori_7 Go to church? I am the church! Registered Senior Member

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    lol...that would make a great snl skit.
     
  13. Bebelina kospla.com Valued Senior Member

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    I've given up dancing too and resigned to telepathy only. These words are not actually written, just read in your mind.
     
  14. Fraggle Rocker Staff Member

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    Speaking as a man, I must confess that most of us are so egotistical that if a woman simply walks up, smiles, and says "Hi," the ice will already be broken. If you don't know what to say next, chances are that the guy will take up the slack. We can talk about ourselves for hours, and then when we get tired of that we'll start asking you questions so you don't have to think of things to say.

    If you're at a party or a bar, wait for a song to come on that you know something about. Then you can walk up to a guy, point vaguely in the direction of the band or the speakers, and say, "I really like this song!" If he does too, then you have something to talk about. If he's not familiar with it, you can tell him the things you like about it. If he doesn't like it, then ask what he does like.

    If you're shy or feel awkward, try to get the other person to start talking about himself and what interests him. Maybe you like the logo on his t-shirt, it can be as simple as that. Maybe the place you're in has an interesting history or some interesting features.

    If it's a place where people are specifically expecting to meet new people (e.g. a bar or a party rather than a coffee shop or a department store), then a little old-fashioned formality can be a great ice breaker. Hold out your hand as an offer to shake hands and say, "Hi, I'm [your name] and I [am a math major/work at a law firm/come from Albuquerque/love poodles/am trying out for the soccer team/am interested in American art/really like it here in Chicago/would rather be somewhere where it's not snowing."]

    I don't know how old you are, but once you've left high school most of the men you meet will respond at least kindly, and perhaps with a smile and a touch of humor, if you approach them with absolutely no pretense or games, and just introduce yourself honestly. If nothing else, you've started the conversation and set the tone at a straightforward level with no coyness, and it's now his turn to introduce himself. After you have each spoken just this one time, you already know something about each other and you might have already found some common ground for a conversation.

    As for bailing out of a conversation, once again being straightforward is the best way. Just say, "Well it's been nice talking to you. Maybe we'll run into each other again," give him just a bit of a smile so he doesn't think he inadvertently said something that insulted you but also doesn't think he's going to get your phone number, and then in a very confident, take-charge manner, turn and walk away. If he calls after you, well hey it's noisy so you didn't hear it.

    It will help to understand one of the many important, fundamental differences between women and men--that Venus/Mars stuff: Women are people-oriented, men are activity-oriented.

    Women find people they like, and then they go out and do the things those people do. My wife actually went bowling a few times because some of her friends from the office were into it. Men, on the other hand, have things they like to do, and they find people who do those things and hang out with them. I play go so I've made friends with some of the people at the go club.

    Therefore, if you're a woman who wants to meet men, the best possible thing you can do is go out and actively do the things you like to do, and meet the men who are there doing the same thing. Talk about an ice-breaker: you've got something in common by definition! If you like mystery novels or impressionist art or daffodils or Persian cats or gemstones or chamber music, go to a museum, exhibit, show or concert. The guys there have something in common with you and will love talking about it.
     
  15. Thoreau Valued Senior Member

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    Well, when it comes to guys, I rarely ever talk to them. I much rather just wait and see if they talk to me. On the rare occassion that I do get the guts to say hello first, I usually get right to the point. Life is too short to dibble dabble around and beat around the bush.
     
  16. shorty_37 Go! Canada Go! Registered Senior Member

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    Ok I have been in this situation a few times. What happens when you get a really pushy guy that doesn't get the hint and walks out with you and keeps asking for your phone # . No matter what you say you can't seem to shake him?

    In those cases I just gave them a phone # but I don't know who's...lol
     
  17. John99 Banned Banned

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    I know of people who never have awkward moments\conversations. At least i couldnt imagine them ever having awkward moments.
     
  18. draqon Banned Banned

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    does not mean they never felt awkward and cornered inside.

    They just did not show it.
     
  19. John99 Banned Banned

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    They can handle these situations better and also they are easier to talk to and usually these people can talk about anything. But this is more of a natural ability like being good at drawing or doing multiplication etc. Ultimately it is kind of superficial.
     
  20. Orleander OH JOY!!!! Valued Senior Member

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    how so?
     
  21. John99 Banned Banned

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    i should have put- to me it is superficial.

    i think the real reason is not so much someone being awkward but just that some people can just sit there and ramble on and on and just never stop talking. this is good in some situations but do i really want to be around this person all the time? usually no.
     
  22. John99 Banned Banned

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    for me, i am not a talker so i need to be around people who are boisterous and rambunctious and flamboyant.

    i cant just sit there and talk about every damn thing that is happening.
     
  23. Dywyddyr Penguinaciously duckalicious. Valued Senior Member

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    Maybe not, but you seem to be okay on posting endless streams of drivel.
     
    Last edited: Nov 28, 2009

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