Marrying outside one’s race in the United States was forbidden by miscegenation laws till as recently as 1967, even as furtive interracial marriages had been occurring as early as the late 1600s. Ever since the archaic laws were struck down, one thing seems obvious—interracial marriages have exploded, a fact confirmed by the 2000 U.S. census. That census was unique in the fact that—for the first time—respondents could choose more than one race to identify themselves with. The results? 11.9 million people consider themselves Asian Americans; 10.2 million of them see themselves as Asian only; but a whopping 1.7 million reported that they are part Asian; that is, mixed. And among all Asians, Chinese, Filipino, Korean and Indian Americans were most likely to consider themselves as having mixed racial origins. Another interesting fact: Among Asians, Indian American males were most likely to marry black women, and Indian American females were most likely to marry within their own race. Shabana Mir had always assumed she would marry a desi. But, Mir adds, only half-jokingly, that desi men wouldn’t be able to handle her. Mir met Svend White at an Islamic conference where they were both presenting papers. But in spite of a shared faith, Mir’s family was ambivalent. “They weren’t sure how much he was a Muslim ‘like us’,” she says, though White had been raised Muslim from birth. Ambivalence turned to opposition—but after meeting him, they finally came around. Racism in South Asian communities also plays a part in opposition. Nisha Kutty, a New York-based fashion photographer, married African American Al-Khabir Richman. And sometimes, when she’s meeting “the more traditional Indians,” she won’t mention that she lives in Brooklyn—or that her husband is black. “Most of the time, their question is why. They’re horrified—they can’t understand why I would have married a black man.” Interracial couples don’t just have to deal with the pressures that every relationship faces—they also have to deal with how the world perceives them. As Ganapathy explains, more challenges stem “from outside our relationship than frictions between us as a couple. Society is still not conditioned to seeing a white man and an Indian woman. Several times when we go out, people just assume we have come separately. At the grocery store, I might be in the check-out line and Kevin right behind me, but the clerk will try to bill us separately. We have to point out that no, we’re together, it’s one single bill.” Mir states candidly that she is tired of being the poster child for interracial harmony. Like most other couples, Mir and White have their arguments—such as a Ramadan tiff about where to eat. http://niralimagazine.com/2007/06/the-united-colors-of-desi An interesting read. Any interracial couples here (besides Chi)? Be interesting to hear about their issues.
I started a thread on a similar topic in Human Science. The Washington Post reported a study showing that a full 25% of both Latinos and Asian-Americans are married to white people. They didn't even count all the mixed marriages in which neither partner is white. Unfortunately my thread is in constant danger of being hijacked by racists. The same thing will probably happen to yours.
Me.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! I am a non white and married a white man. We haven't had many issues as such from our family. One of my husband's friends had a bit of a problem with it, which manifested itself when our first child was a baby and at that time he was very white with green eyes. My husband's friend commented to my husband that it was good our son was as white as my husband, because then at least he will blend in with my husband's nephews.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! The friend was asked to leave by my husband as he found it offensive.
Both of you must come from pretty progressive families. Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
Not really. I also think that the animosity in mixed couples stems mostly from cultural attitudes. Those who live in a closed culture tend to expect their offspring to marry within said culture. The same applies to white westerners. As John said, the herding instinct.
Possibly, though the dynamics are different in India. There, inspite of cultural diversity, the expectation of marrying within their own culture is still very strong.
I think this is an issue with all desi people, even in (pardes) foreign countries. In the subcontinent, we have had a long history of marrying within our tribe/caste and pride in our heritage. This most likely stems from this fact.
Its Indian lingo for someone from the Subcontinent. des = country; desi =from my country.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image! http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=desi http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Desi
We gotta help the ABCDs (American Abroad Born Confused Desis) Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
hummm thanks for the help, so i am an ABCD, bearing in mind my grandad (my dad's side)comes from Gujrat???!?!?
If you are 10[sup]1000[/sup] Indian you are a desi. Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
You can share in our rich culture mate, what else do you want? Tamara mate taaja penda layeene rakhso, amaara baadi-ay aaojo.Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
So both of you are Gujurati, man I guess I'm the only Punjabi on this forum. I wonder if there are any other desi people in the forum.
Blasians baby, blasians. I knew a girl that was asian/irish, unbelieveably cute- asian features and freckles...
I'm a mongrel; part Gujarati, part Malvani, some Pathan and some unknown (adopted grandparent).Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!
I'm full Panjabi, however I have relatives, through family marriage, who are Persian, Kashmiri, and Pathan. We take great pride in our Rajput heritage and Lahori birth. We have a saying in Lahore. Jinneh L'hor ney dekha, woh jameah ney.
