Not all babies cry - our culture makes it so

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by Theoryofrelativity, Sep 29, 2006.

?

Were you a baby at one time in your life

  1. Yes

    53.8%
  2. No, this explains my intolerance towards babies and parents

    46.2%
  1. Theoryofrelativity Banned Banned

    Messages:
    5,595
    deleted in protest to really poor moderation
     
    Last edited: Mar 1, 2007
  2. Guest Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  3. spuriousmonkey Banned Banned

    Messages:
    24,066
    hehe...

    this i can believe.
     
  4. Guest Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  5. Baron Max Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    23,053
    It's the white man's fault, mostly Americans, ...and President Bush was the instigator of it all.

    Baron Max
     
  6. Guest Guest Advertisement



    to hide all adverts.
  7. Theoryofrelativity Banned Banned

    Messages:
    5,595
    so you suggest this is a 'white phenomenon' interetsing and possibly correct

    I wonder what long term effect being a 'crying baby' has when you become an adult? More insecure perhaps? More likely to fear others perhaps?

    Were you a 'BIG cry baby' as a baby Baron?
     
  8. Roman Banned Banned

    Messages:
    11,560
    It's because our culture isn't properly teaching the babies how to externalize the internal.

    This is clearly new evidence for telepathy.
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2006
  9. cole grey Hi Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,999
    If you don't think a baby crying is a nuisance, that baby must have some weak lungs.

    But you can't blame the pooping/crying/eating machine for doing its job.

    EDIT - pooping/crying/eating/learning machine
     
    Last edited: Sep 29, 2006
  10. tablariddim forexU2 Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    4,795
    I have very little experience with babies, but from my observations of the family's babies I've noticed that they tend to cry when they're hungry and when they're teething, which seems reasonable behaviour to me.

    Other causes of babies distress that I've noticed is when others, usually older siblings, are pushing and pulling the baby or otherwise not letting it relax. It also seems reasonable to assume that long periods of not being touched, carressed and 'mothered' would also cause baby to cry.
     
  11. Theoryofrelativity Banned Banned

    Messages:
    5,595
    Thre are lots of reasons for crying (modern culture) babies, but the nature of this thread is the diffrences between us and those cultures where crying is unheard of ....literally!
     
  12. Baron Max Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    23,053
    I, too, think it's perfectly reasonable. Have you ever watched nature shows with animal offspring bouncing around the mother? They want and need direct attention, touching, loving, .....and when they get it, they're quiet and happy and playful.

    Lest y'all think differently, humans are animals, too. We can learn a lot from the animals, it's too bad that we continually try to distance ourselves from them to boost our own fragile egos.

    Baron Max
     
  13. Fraggle Rocker Staff Member

    Messages:
    24,690
    This came up on another thread just a couple of days ago. I'm impressed with the phenomenon of synchronicity. Apparently something has sparked this question in more than one mind. The collective unconscious at work?

    Nonetheless it reminds each of us to be humble: We are not the only deep thinker on this website.

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!



    It would be helpful to do a quick search to see if our topic is already under discussion. Surely combining the two discussion groups would enrich both and propel the discourse to an even more profound level.
     
  14. spuriousmonkey Banned Banned

    Messages:
    24,066
    It's just ToR. She likes making threads on discussions that are already there.
     
  15. Bells Staff Member

    Messages:
    24,270
    Oh for goodness sake. Babies will cry when they are hungry, tired, have a dirty nappy, upset, have wind, pass wind (some babies do not like the feeling of farting and can become distressed when they need to fart and usually grow out of it after a couple of months), handled too much, handled too little, etc.

    It is normal for babies to cry. It is how they communicate. If you don't like the sound of a crying baby or if it annoys you that much, the answer is simple, do not have children.

    It is not only impracticle to hold a baby 24/7, it is also virtually impossible and can be dangerous. For example, I have never felt comfortable having my son sleep between us on the bed as a small baby and even now as a 1 year old. Reason being he is a very active sleeper and always has been, and I cannot sleep knowing that I could roll over onto him and smother him or have him crawl over me in his sleep and fall off the bed (yes he crawls around his cot in his sleep). Having a shower would be impossible as I would be unable to use soap or any other product such as shampoo in case it got into the baby's eyes. Cooking would be a huge hazard as I cannot even begin to imagine holding a child while standing in front of a hot stove or doing something like draining pasta. Imagine going to the toilet with a baby in a strap on your back or front... I won't even go there. And as a parent who adores my son, I could not walk around holding him for 24/7 without a nappy, the effects would just be, well, nasty..

    In short, I hugged and held my baby as much as possible, but I also gave him downtime to be able to spread out and move around, which he did .. a lot. You need to find a balance and sometimes it can be hard. I remember as a newborn when I was in hospital a day after his birth, he used to scream his head off every night, and I was advised by the midwife that it was because he was handled too much just before being put down to sleep, and sure enough they were right. He slept like a charm after a quick cuddle and kiss and was put down straight away. If he was held for too much he became over stimulated and excited by whoever was cuddling him and that would be it, no sleep. If the women in Africa find their way works for them, then good on them. They live in a tribe where other women will do the cooking for them, etc. We in the west do not.

    And lets not forget, some babies are cryers and others are not. Thankfully my son was not after I had learned that he did not like to be held too much and prefered to be down where he could explore.. which he did to the fullest.. he could roll across his cot and wherever he was put down by the time he was 3 months and was crawling and standing and walking with the furniture by the time he was 6 months... well things became a charm and he was and still is a happy and highly affectionate baby

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

    .
     
  16. Baron Max Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    23,053
    Interesting, Bells ...you've had one baby in a western cultural environment, yet you seem to hold yourself out as an expert in babies in all cultures around the world? Geez, you're pretty damned impressive!

    Are you also an expert in other things as well? Like, perhaps nuclear physics and open-heart surgery and Celestial Mechanics as well?

    Baron Max
     
  17. francois Schwat? Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,515
    Remember: not all babies are the same.
    Some cry a lot; others hardly cry at all. Some babies are considered "tempermental;" others are "easy" babies. Babies aren't conditioned by culture, because they're so new. Crying can't be attributable to culture. It's much more likely to be innate.
     
  18. spuriousmonkey Banned Banned

    Messages:
    24,066

    Culture can effect the behaviour of the baby if a certain culture better fits the nature of the baby or vice versa.
     
  19. Baron Max Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    23,053
    Yeah, I agree ....and I don't know how you can say otherwise in the face of overwhelming evidence that some babies in some cultures don't cry nearly as much as others.

    Is this the first time we've ever agreed, Spurious?

    Baron Max
     
  20. spuriousmonkey Banned Banned

    Messages:
    24,066
    no..see thread on sociology.
     
  21. Theoryofrelativity Banned Banned

    Messages:
    5,595
    no one here is disagreeing with the evidence re diff cultures and levels of crying, unless they advocate neglect of babies of course.

    Myself I appreciate that other cultures do things differently and this indeed does show a substantial diffrence in levels of crying. But at the same time I acknowledge that the way 'we' live in this modern world, makes it quite improssible to function if required to mirror their habits of holding baby 24/7 for 6 months. As I detailed in opening post, the 'norms' of acceptable behaviour just do not permit it.

    I myself favoured a very natural approach and held my babies as much as poss and never left them with sitters, family or otherwise until eldest was 3.5yrs old (youngest 2) and even then less than 5 times! Once with a sitter and twice with my mum while I was in hospital. Apparantly children are more secure not less secure if they attach well to their mum. This has played out with me.

    Both my children are very confident, not remotely clingy and my
    youngest started nursery and school with enthusiasm and never had any separation issues or anxieties. My youngest is keen to start nursery, they are both very social.

    I think we can learn a lot from other cultures on issues pertaining to parenting, particularly as in the west the family unit is becoming more and more dysfunctional.

    Parents never know it all until they are grandparents

    Please Register or Log in to view the hidden image!

     
  22. spuriousmonkey Banned Banned

    Messages:
    24,066
    Yay! That's the way to go! (i hope).

    Our oldest one is almost too social. The baby actually hardly cries, maybe because he is never short of attention.
     
  23. Carcano Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    6,865
    Something else thats been largely abandoned in the modern era is the traditional practise of SWADDLING. Wrapping the baby up a tight coccon of fabric, which has a tranquilizing effect, improving sleep and overall disposition.

    http://www.cosyplanet.co.uk/about_swaddling.php
     

Share This Page