My Cat is Stupid, But He is Cute...

Discussion in 'Free Thoughts' started by TruthSeeker, Dec 19, 2005.

  1. TruthSeeker Fancy Virtual Reality Monkey Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    15,162
    Should I give him away? Or leave him in the street?

    Once I saw my cat
    He was p***** in my hat
    Should I give him away? Or leave him in the street?

    Once I saw my cat
    He was peeing in my flat
    Should I give him away? Or leave him in the street?

    Once I saw my cat
    He was eating my garbage can
    Should I put him there?

    Once I saw my cat
    He was chewing my computer cables
    and they broke and I was without internet
    Should I strangle him with the cord?

    Once I saw my cat
    He was leaking his ****
    and running around the house
    and destroying everything
    and running around his tail.......


    Aaaawwwwwww.....

    Should I give him away? Or leave him in the street?


    Huuuuuummmm... in one hand he is stupid. In the other, he is cute. So what should I do with him?

    Huuumm... what a puzzle...

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    Geeeeez... I'm really bed with poems....

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  3. Perfect Masturbation without hands Registered Senior Member

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    Well.. If you're aware of your incoherent nature and ways, you've seen to it that the cat will survive on its own. If not (which seems self-explanatory), you will take care of it.

    If you failed the two above, get strangled. As a human, it is your duty to descend to the animal’s level since you forcefully molded its surroundings to 50square meter flats and such.
     
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  5. Perfect Masturbation without hands Registered Senior Member

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    293
    TS TS hates his cat

    flatulent human, a spoiled brat
     
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  7. leopold Valued Senior Member

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    17,455
    i hate cats. they are disgusting animals who think their shit don't stink
     
  8. poliwog Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    171
    Ah, I once had a dog like that. A toy poodle named Spike. He was a hateful little bastard. To remedy your situation might I recommend stuffing him in the dryer for 5 seconds.

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    But seriously, if he truly hates you go ahead and do it. If all he is doing is wetting everywhere, chewing cords, and eating trash, litter train him, hide the cords, and get a kitty proof trash can.

    How old is this cat? If he is older, he might have a weak bladder. If he is fairly young he might have problems that should be checked by a vet. Have you ever tried to litter train him? If many attempts have failed he might be destined to be an outside cat. You shouldn't leave him for doing things cats just do. Try looking for cat training tips on www.google.com
     
  9. spidergoat pubic diorama Valued Senior Member

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    Well, my cat is smart and cute.
     
  10. valich Registered Senior Member

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    3,501
    People are smarter than most other animals so you first have to overcome that fact if you want to have any pet, and accept it and be responsible for it.

    If you think it is cute, then you must like it somewhat.

    On the other hand if you do not like it because you think it is stupid, then I would suggest you first ask around to your friends - or anyone - if they would like to have a "cute" cat.

    You should not just leave him in the streets. This would be inhumane. He would then have to rely on his own resources to survive, and the chances are that he wouldn't.

    You could also turn him over to the humane society, but then again remember that there is a good chance that no one will adopt him and then he would be put to sleep.

    Ask your friends, post notices around the neighborhood, or maybe even put an add in a local newspaper: "nice cute cat free to good home."
     
  11. poliwog Registered Senior Member

    Messages:
    171
    I must disagree with you there. Lets face it, alot of people are pretty stupid. In fact I bet you $50 my dog, Emma is smarter than at least half of the people who have posted on this thread as of now.
     
  12. TruthSeeker Fancy Virtual Reality Monkey Valued Senior Member

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    Why is this still not in the cesspool? :bugeye:

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  13. poliwog Registered Senior Member

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    What makes it Cesspool worthy: the whole poodle in the dryer thing, or the fact that your poetry sucks?

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    Just so you know I would NEVER stuff Emma in the dryer. ONLY Spike was that disliked. I love Emma.

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    Last edited: Dec 20, 2005
  14. TruthSeeker Fancy Virtual Reality Monkey Valued Senior Member

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    15,162
    This thread is not worthy of the Free Thoughts section. The poem is stupid, the replies are disgraceful and the subject is ridiculous. Who was the moron who started this thread? :bugeye:
     
  15. archibring Registered Member

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    29
    i expect to have a smart and cute dog. but i do not have enough money to get one.

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  16. valich Registered Senior Member

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    No doubt on that point!

    But I think dogs are smarter than cats. A big difference is that cats seem to have a mind of their own: finicky, stuck-up, or snobbish maybe. On the other hands, dogs love to be around people and give you unconditional love - unless they are abused. They are easy to train and anxious to obey, so as to be obedient towards their bestfriend "master-owner."

    But cats are cool too. Dumb, evil-minded, destuctive, harmful, psycologically warped people suck.
     
  17. poliwog Registered Senior Member

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    171
    That is an exact description of how Spike was. Emma, on the other hand is perfect in every single way except for the destructive part

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    . Even her poops are perfect

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    .

    P.S. That little winking thing at the end of my last sentence was Emma. She winks at people. I don't know why.

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  18. spuriousmonkey Banned Banned

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    24,066
    My pet dolphin is smarter than any of your dogs or cats.
     
  19. poliwog Registered Senior Member

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    171
    Can your dolphin wink?
     
  20. TruthSeeker Fancy Virtual Reality Monkey Valued Senior Member

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    15,162
    Dogs are less expensive to maintain then wives.
    I never really cared about money... and then I got married.

    But wives are more romantic then dogs. You can't really have a romantic dinner with a dog, can you? So wives are worth the money spent.

    So don't say you don't have enough money to buy a dog. You can always adopt one. And they are less expensive to keep then wives. You just need to buy the dog some food and some vet services. Wifes, on the other hand, need food, clothes, doctors, clothes, appliances, clothes.....

    Of course nothing is as bad as a mother-in-law........

    But anyways....


    PS: Of course I'm just joking.

    Yaba Daba! :m:
     
  21. TruthSeeker Fancy Virtual Reality Monkey Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    15,162
    When my wife used to get drunk she would talk with the cat and tell him he is an alien.

    Yes, sometimes they seem like aliens.... :m:
     
  22. TruthSeeker Fancy Virtual Reality Monkey Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    15,162
    MY flying pink dolphin from the wonderful candyland rainbow city is in exile in my closet and can actually wink.........
     
  23. TruthSeeker Fancy Virtual Reality Monkey Valued Senior Member

    Messages:
    15,162
    On another note. My cat thinks he is a dog. He is always waiting for me when I come home. He licks me all the time. He begs for food. He even rolls and stuff. I think he needs a psychologist. Wow... nice... a psychologist for my cat... now I feel like a socialite....

    Yaba Daba! :m:
     

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