View Full Version : Women and Handguns?


Baron Max
10-21-05, 06:38 PM
The top ten reasons why handguns are better then women:


#10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

#9. You can keep one handgun at home and have another for when you're
on the road.

#8. If you admire a friend's handgun and tell him so, he will
probably let you try it out a few times.

#7. Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you keep another handgun for
a backup.

#6. Your handgun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

#5. A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

#4. Handguns function normally every day of the month.

#3. A handgun doesn't ask , "Do these new grips make me look fat?"

#2. A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.



And the number one reason a handgun is favored over a woman

#1. YOU CAN BUY A SILENCER FOR A HANDGUN.

Copied from a website somewhere ....no, I don't know where! No, I don't know the author. Yes, I'm probably gonna' go to jail for it.

Baron Max

Roman
10-21-05, 07:44 PM
Now give us the top ten for beer and big trucks.

vslayer
10-21-05, 08:31 PM
well handguns are illegal here, so were all stuck with women.

Beryl
10-21-05, 09:01 PM
You're much less likely to get accidentally killed by a woman, though...

Notice I say <i>accidentally</i>.

Baron Max
10-22-05, 12:35 PM
You're much less likely to get accidentally killed by a woman, though... Notice I say <i>accidentally</i>.

Hmm, are you sure about that?? I wonder how we could check those statistics? Do you know how? Did you check before you posted?

Baron Max

justagirl
10-22-05, 01:02 PM
haha next time a guy wants something, perhaps I should send him home so he can play with his gun :D

cato
10-22-05, 01:18 PM
nice one justagirl

Baron Max
10-22-05, 01:32 PM
haha next time a guy wants something, perhaps I should send him home so he can play with his gun

...LOL! Well, he might not like it, but at least the gun would "shoot" when he wanted it to! ...LOL!

Good one, though, really good one.

Baron Max

Roman
10-22-05, 03:44 PM
You're much less likely to get accidentally killed by a woman, though...

I bet at least a quarter of all traffic accidents are caused by women.

justagirl
10-22-05, 07:12 PM
...LOL! Well, he might not like it, but at least the gun would "shoot" when he wanted it to! ...LOL!

Good one, though, really good one.

Baron Max


lol unless he mishandles it and causes an accident discharge :p

Rick
10-22-05, 08:05 PM
top reason why u are a nutcase :
Women are here to make us feel happy and full.
Amen.

Later
Rick

SoLiDUS
10-23-05, 02:08 AM
uh, no... happy and EMPTY. Har har! Oh my, I'm going to Hell...

Baron Max
10-23-05, 07:43 AM
Women are here to make us feel happy and full. Amen.

If so, then why the hell don't they do it!?! Or better yet, when the hell are they gonna' start! :)

A 5-to-10 minute bit o' happiness and joy once a week/month is NOT what I'd call "happy and full", would you?

Baron Max

James R
10-23-05, 07:31 PM
I bet at least a quarter of all traffic accidents are caused by women.

Hmm... not sure. I think the percentage may be lower than that. Statistically, the most accident-prone drivers are young males (16 - 25 year olds, or there abouts). That's why their insurance premiums are so much higher.

Neildo
10-23-05, 08:52 PM
Heh, funny list. I gotta share it.

- N

GodlessEvil
10-23-05, 10:37 PM
Yeah but if you want sex with a handgun, it means shoving it up your ass, and if a handgun gives you a blowjob what happens if you ask it to spit?

Baron Max
10-24-05, 07:06 AM
Yeah but if you want sex with a handgun, it means shoving it up your ass, and if a handgun gives you a blowjob what happens if you ask it to spit?

That might be true. But by the same token, if you want to have sex with a woman, what happens? You have to beg and plead, buy flowers, take her to dinner and a movie, and even then she might say 'No'. As for getting a woman to give you a blowjob, .....? Geez, you have to jump thru all the hoops that she wants!

But just so you know, one doesn't ask a handgun to have sex with him! Just where are you from, Godless? :)

Baron Max

john smith
11-04-05, 06:03 AM
If so, then why the hell don't they do it!?! Or better yet, when the hell are they gonna' start! :)?

O M G !!!!!!!! I feel for you Baron, i really do!

A 5-to-10 minute bit o' happiness and joy once a week/month is NOT what I'd call "happy and full", would you?:)

How long Baron?Could you repeat?

A 5-to-10 minute bit o' happiness

Pardon, say again...

A 5-to-10 minute bit o' happiness

Baron Baron Baron, at last i can see why you are so full of bitter hatred for life, why your entire life revolves around being racist and abusive, why you hold such wacko views, because you can only last for....how long?????? :D

EmptyForceOfChi
11-04-05, 06:29 AM
haha i was thinking the exact same thing man,

but hey that list is funny shit, not that i agree with any of it but its still funny (i have to type this my wife is watching)

*starts doing morse code for i agree with you baron*

nah im joking i dont agree but it is funny, and man whats the 5 min thing all about, seriosuly 5 to 10 mins huh? damn thats why u prefer guns to women.


peace.

vincent28uk
09-10-06, 03:41 AM
The top ten reasons why handguns are better then women:


#10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.

#9. You can keep one handgun at home and have another for when you're
on the road.

#8. If you admire a friend's handgun and tell him so, he will
probably let you try it out a few times.

#7. Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you keep another handgun for
a backup.

#6. Your handgun will stay with you even if you run out of ammo.

#5. A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.

#4. Handguns function normally every day of the month.

#3. A handgun doesn't ask , "Do these new grips make me look fat?"

#2. A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.



And the number one reason a handgun is favored over a woman

#1. YOU CAN BUY A SILENCER FOR A HANDGUN.

Copied from a website somewhere ....no, I don't know where! No, I don't know the author. Yes, I'm probably gonna' go to jail for it.

Baron Max

Hilarious, i agree with alot of the points, but at the end of the day you cant beat a complete mental connection with another humanbeing, a complete connection with a gun, would mean having to shoot lead into yourself.

Lead is cold, the right human is warm.

vslayer
09-10-06, 05:40 AM
Hmm... not sure. I think the percentage may be lower than that. Statistically, the most accident-prone drivers are young males (16 - 25 year olds, or there abouts). That's why their insurance premiums are so much higher.

im not sure about premiums, but my excess is only $300 more than my parents and older brothers.

i actually ran out of space when i was listing the crash history on my insurance form. 3 for myself, 2 for my elder brother and one for my eldest brother. :P

i stand by my record though, 3 write-offs and not a single fatality.

Vega
09-10-06, 06:24 AM
top reason why u are a nutcase :
Women are here to make us feel happy and full.
Amen.

Later
Rick
...and ruin our lives! :D

Baron Max
09-10-06, 07:04 AM
Hilarious, i agree with alot of the points, but at the end of the day you cant beat a complete mental connection with another human being, ....

Complete mental connection? When the hell has THAT ever happened? ...especially between a man and a woman? :)

Baron Max

vincent28uk
09-10-06, 12:56 PM
Complete mental connection? When the hell has THAT ever happened? ...especially between a man and a woman? :)

Baron Max


Your problem is this Baron, your a CIA international spy, a bit like bond you have a whore in every city bagdad, kabul, budapest, tehran, etc, your in the states a couple of months, of every year, you have no time to find your soul mate, your soul mate baron is a magnum 44.

You need to retire, settle down, gets some waitress in some hick little town in the states, who makes good apple pie, put a few apples in her oven, & marry the gal.

Dont you want little barons running about?