This is getting ridiculous. I actually don't like to argue with people. Why must I argue? And then I feel bad afterward. FFS.
You're just pointing out what amounts to lies from those who peddle them. You feel bad most likely because you can't believe those people have the nerve to spread such lies.
You just haven't realized that most people are willfully ignorant and that you are wasting your time trying to convince them of anything. There are people who are open to discussion, and there are people who are not. The trick is finding those that want to have an open and intelligent discussion. The people who just want to argue, are not worth your time. I just ignore the ones who have an inability to learn or think things through fully. I also actively reject people who show a lack of logical though processes. I don't like people who waste my time because there are lots of other who don't. When a conversation teeters on the "are you f'ing kidding me??" scale, I just walk away instead of engaging them. Continuing to engage them only encourages them to be more willful.
I suppose that everyone has different views on people they should ignore. I don't know his posts well enough to say one way or another. My post was from an objective standpoint, but it's subjective to each individual as each individual will find different people willfully ignorant. Now that I look at his posts, I see why you (S.A.M.) personally would come up with that assumption. I am sure he has the same opinion of you for your willfulness as well. In that case, you should ignore each other really since you will never concede or agree on any points on the subject of Isreal and Palestine. It's a waste of time trying to change either of your minds, and that is exactly my point.
Lord. I post a little remorse about arguing, and Sam comes by to obscure, labeling me with all the vices Liebling discusses, and which she - unlike me - presents.
but still in yet, the premise for the original post's question has not been addressed. Only interpreted and dismissed. We need to back up. This poster is not looking for rationale or justification of their arguments. The OP is genuinely concerned as to why he has a tendency to argue with others when it only leads to remorse. I think it's natural to argue and that the remorse is something all together different.
Thanks EF. Maybe my question is too easy. I mean, remorse or guilt and morality are two different things, aren't they? Or are they?
You misunderstand. (I get tired of writing that.) My arguments are all completely correct, but I hate having to argue them with other people. In other words, I hate to have to fight.
I'm not kidding. I always hire Catholic undergrads for grunt work. They really do feel guilty about everything.
It's funny - since we have Sam on hand, let's use her then. I think Sam and I would get along great in real life, aside from our political differences. Yet old Brian Foley I would have happily hit with a shovel. Is this why I hate to argue, perhaps? Or perhaps this is a different issue altogether?
I think that some people passionately want their opinion to be right and accepted, and they will assert it repeatedly. Most people who argue are passionate and opinionated on the subjects they are debating, and some will stop at nothing to convince others. It also may come from a feeling of intellectual superiority, and I wouldn't be surprised if those who do argue a lot, feel that other people are idiots. And they might feel badly for thinking that way, because it goes against the kind of person they think they are. When we recognize flaws within ourself, they are not only hard to accept but they often make us ashamed because we didn't think we actually felt that way. It's hard to get around that, except for learning a little humility, patience and the ability to ignore people. And that's what I was just suggesting. Learn to ignore the people you feel are being willful because they will never agree with you.
Thats complete gibberish. People argue because they like to. Other people don't because they are inhibited/nonconfrontational/shy/unsure/too full of themselves to proffer an opinion.
All right, then. This may in part be true. Misplaced or obsessive guilt? Yet I wasn't born Catholic. All my students so far have been Hindus, actually. They don't feel especially guilty, although one of them felt bad for ducking out because of "woman troubles".
Indians never feel guilty. We just chalk it up to trial and error. Or karma. Or fate, destiny, God, a previous birth, inauspicious omens. A very stress free attitude.
Remorse is what we feel when we think we may have been taken advantage of. The question is: Who took advantage of you? When we are remorseful about that which we ourselves initiate, we our focused on a dissatisfaction with the ends not justifying the means. You regret having paid a price for something you already own.
Or some don't proffer an opinion because they don't have anything to add to the subject, or because it wouldn't make a difference even if they added their opinion. Why waste your time? I read a lot of threads in which I don't post because either it's degraded into a non-sense argument full of ad homs, or because I don't feel like anyone would listen anyhow. There are plenty of subjects I know a lot about, but some times people don't talk when they don't have anything to add. It has nothing to do with being inhibited, non-confrontational, shy, unsure of oneself or being too full of themselves. There are a few people here I converse with outside the threads of these forums and I am sure that I would not be described by any of those words. Some people choose to find a time in which to argue their position when they think they can actually influence the conversation. They don't have to go off half cocked at all times looking for a fight. But you are right, there are some people like that and you were probably speaking of yourself as an example of one of those people. They are also marked by willfulness and irrational thought processes, even though they will staunchly deny that. Doesn't make them bad people, just harder to interact with sometimes. I describe those people as having a "Ready - Shoot - Aim" philosophy. And while they are not wrong in the way they approach things, it takes all sorts to figure out a problem and resolve it.
