What inventions do you see as totally pointless?

Cordless keyboard: Pain in the ass to change the battery's when you would almost never want the keyboard further than a cord length because you can't read the screen anyway.

Next

Oohh ooohh electronic paper towel dispensers

boots/ shoes......clothes for dogs

boots/ shoes......clothes for dogs

I have to disagree.

Diesel looks butt ugly without a tee shirt and he grumbles when we take it off, cos it reduces his hotness!:D

http://img525.imageshack.us/img525/2572/dieselic9.jpg

[QUOTE=S.A.M.;1783212]I have to disagree.

Diesel looks butt ugly without a tee shirt and he grumbles when we take it off, cos it reduces his hotness!:D

Pointless Invention. Hearing aid for Sam's dog.
I bet there's not much that dog doesn't hear.
Got ears like a bat.

Pointless Invention:
The Great British Political Party system. I would love for them to all go on strike just to prove that they don't actually do anything to cause any forms of disruption.

something less political:
A Jar Opener. My sister swears by one, I just swear at how pointless it is.
http://www.blackanddeckerappliances.com/dyn/prod/full/212/JW275_500X.jpg

Nipple pasties especially the ones with jewels/tassels!

http://www.ginasgems.com/images/03_images/03_ruby-01.jpg

http://images.etsy.com/all_images/b/ba3/4f3/il_430xN.8161733.jpg

They're just nipples guys, get used to them! wtf?

Jeans fith pocket (the little one). Even if you can get something in it, like a quarter or a guitar pick, you will struggle like hell to get it back out.
Actually, I quit wearing jeans 10 years ago.

Shampoo/conditioner in one.
If you use them at the same time they cancel eachother out. Stupid.

The Chevy El Camino. It's definition of Indecisiveness.

A Jar Opener. My sister swears by one, I just swear at how pointless it is.
http://www.blackanddeckerappliances.com/dyn/prod/full/212/JW275_500X.jpg


If you ever have arthritis or a hand injury this is a very great gadget to have around to help. I know, I bought one for my mom when she couldn't open the jar lids any longer. :)

Nipple pasties especially the ones with jewels/tassels!

http://www.ginasgems.com/images/03_images/03_ruby-01.jpg

http://images.etsy.com/all_images/b/ba3/4f3/il_430xN.8161733.jpg

They're just nipples guys, get used to them! wtf?

Can I post some nipples here then ? :D

What inventions do you see as totally pointless?

Cordless keyboard: Pain in the ass to change the battery's when you would almost never want the keyboard further than a cord length because you can't read the screen anyway.

Next

I can see the screen on my 37" HDTV just fine from the couch, as I remote control my Media Centre PC using a wireless keyboard, surf the internet, and play games, thanks!

Jeans fith pocket (the little one). Even if you can get something in it, like a quarter or a guitar pick, you will struggle like hell to get it back out.
Actually, I quit wearing jeans 10 years ago.

I used to keep a condom in mine, in case I got lucky. Maybe you aren't the lucky sort.

Nipple pasties especially the ones with jewels/tassels!

http://www.ginasgems.com/images/03_images/03_ruby-01.jpg

http://images.etsy.com/all_images/b/ba3/4f3/il_430xN.8161733.jpg

They're just nipples guys, get used to them! wtf?

Why Sam, you sound like you've actually tried these, but with less than desireable results.

I used to keep a condom in mine, in case I got lucky. Maybe you aren't the lucky sort.


If you're having sex with people you don't want to have children with and may have a diseases, you need luck more than I do. I hope it holds out for you.

Nipple pasties especially the ones with jewels/tassels!

http://www.ginasgems.com/images/03_images/03_ruby-01.jpg

http://images.etsy.com/all_images/b/ba3/4f3/il_430xN.8161733.jpg

They're just nipples guys, get used to them! wtf?

Accepted, but could you post a picture of your dog wearing them?

If you're having sex with people you don't want to have children with and may have a diseases, you need luck more than I do. I hope it holds out for you.

You seem to not grasp that my sentence was on the past tense. Anyway, any new sexual partner could give you a disease, unless you are both uptight virgins saving it for marriage, of course.

You seem to not grasp the word "if" in the begining of my post.

But ,yes. I believe the decision of parenthood should come before you stick your pecker in and create a life.

Strange concept, eh?

This key on the keyboard

` <-----------

What the hell can it do other than take up space???

You just did it.. :p

You just did it.. :p

Did what??

This key on the keyboard

` <-----------

What the hell can it do other than take up space???


Enter?
Backspace?
arrow key?

What key?

Did what??

Do the only thing you can do with it :p

flavoured condoms

I'll take your word on that.

I'll take your word on that.

Never tried them, just seem retarded to me.

The whole idea is taste good right? Well a mouth full of rubber
just don't do it for me.........strawberrry, bananna or whatever.

rubber chikens?
http://www.memphismarshas.com/rubber_chicken.jpeg

rubber chikens?
http://www.memphismarshas.com/rubber_chicken.jpeg

Don't grip it so tight :D LOL

Is that an invention?

"my uncle invented the rubber chicken"

yeah, I guess that works.

The carrying cases for bananas were invented some years ago. :) I haven't seen any in stores though.

Is that an invention?

"my uncle invented the rubber chicken"

yeah, I guess that works.

But "my uncle didn't invent the rubber chicken" also works, weird!

I once had a little doodad that was, well, it was a speaker for like a cd player or mp3 player that you would suction cup to a window, mirror, smooth table, etc. and it would make that surface into a not-very-loud, horrible-quality speaker. Totally, f'n, pointless...

If you ever have arthritis or a hand injury this is a very great gadget to have around to help. I know, I bought one for my mom when she couldn't open the jar lids any longer. :)

I see them as pointless because in example, you're mother could be socialising with people to 'Open the Jar for her'.

A better one is the Electric Pepper pot, with the button to grind the pepper. It's all very lazy.

This key on the keyboard

` <-----------

What the hell can it do other than take up space???
It opens Quake's console, and that justifies its existance entirely. :p

The first thing I though of when I read the OP was this particular Calvin and Hobbes comic by Bill Waterson:
http://img410.imageshack.us/img410/7205/ch081700iq7.th.gif (http://img410.imageshack.us/my.php?image=ch081700iq7.gif)

-Andrew

boots/ shoes......clothes for dogs

I put a coat on mine to stop her getting muddy when it's raining.

Drive through liquor stores?


http://home.telkomsa.net/anton/DSC00367_exposure.jpg

Shoes for dogs are a good thing. For example in winters when the streets are salted dog feet get irritated by the salt and it's actually harmful to them.
Also police in Germany use dog shoes so that they don't cut their feet on broken glass, etc. when on duty.

This key on the keyboard

` <-----------

What the hell can it do other than take up space???

Yeah which key are you talking about?

If it's the tilde/prime key (~/`) both the prime and the tilde have uses. Prime being obviously to express prime in math. And tilde to denote a regular expression in Perl to name one for each.

TA-DA!
http://www.hot-screensaver.com/wp-myimages/dvd-rewinder.jpg

But ,yes. I believe the decision of parenthood should come before you stick your pecker in and create a life.

Strange concept, eh?

Hence the prophylactic, pay attention.

Very soon the $ key will be reduntant,

I just noticed that this thread says "totally Pointly inventions" lol...

Oh yeah Opps pointly, strange word.

Wow the eyes really do play tricks on you. I could have bet it said Pointless.... :shrug:

me too

Wow the eyes really do play tricks on you. I could have bet it said Pointless.... :shrug:

It's known as "optical confusion" , I think

Hence the prophylactic, pay attention.

yeah, didn't work for me. Glad I loved her.

Also police in Germany use dog shoes so that they don't cut their feet on broken glass, etc. when on duty.

That's all very well for the police.
What about their dogs?

Totally pointless inventions:

Edible underwear.

Who feels a craving for underwear? Duh!

Oohh ooohh electronic paper towel dispensers

I can't live without them... need to turn off the sink and open the door without dirtying my hands.

Paper Weight............Has anybody ever used one?

Pet Rocks

Here are a few:

Butter Stick

http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/4210/butterstickeq3.jpg


Duster Cat Slippers (while they run around let them dust your floors)

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/5167/dusterslippersdu8.jpg

Food Cooler Fan

http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/6317/foodcoolerns3.jpg

User-operated amusement apparatus for kicking the user's buttocks (http://www.petealbrecht.com/blog/pat%206293874.jpg)

Totally pointless inventions:

Edible underwear.

Who feels a craving for underwear? Duh!

i'd go for it

User-operated amusement apparatus for kicking the user's buttocks (http://www.petealbrecht.com/blog/pat%206293874.jpg)

LOL is that one of your own inventions :D

I only wish I had thought of it first.

What inventions do you see as totally pointless?

Cordless keyboard: Pain in the ass to change the battery's when you would almost never want the keyboard further than a cord length because you can't read the screen anyway.

Next

Cordless peripherals are nice because you no longer have the problem of cords everywhere.

They're just nipples guys, get used to them! wtf?

Not our fault, S.A.M. They accommodate archaic "decency" standards, and now have a certain nostalgic value. The Floater concert in Seattle for New Year included performances by ... uh ... I think they were called the Burning Hearts Burlesque or something like that. This one woman got up and danced to that Muppet song "Phenomenon" with pasties on her breasts and googly-eyes stuck on her ass. It was hilarious.

And besides, there is some skill involved in using tasseled pasties properly. Like making the tassles spin in opposite directions in time to the music? Really, it's great.

• • •

Jeans fith pocket (the little one). Even if you can get something in it, like a quarter or a guitar pick, you will struggle like hell to get it back out.

Cigarette lighters. That's what I use that pocket for. Well, used. And will again, I'm sure.

You can also hide a good bud there, and if you wrap it properly, it's not too tough to get back out.

• • •


This key on the keyboard

` <-----------

What the hell can it do other than take up space???

Windows users might have some trouble with it, but for Mac users, you just hit Option-` and then the letter you want accented, and voilà.

Or maybe it's supposed to be voilá. Or voilâ. Voilä?

Anyway, it's an accent key. And, I'm told, in LaTeX, it's used for an opening quote mark. ``How are you today?''

And it has some purpose elsewhere in online publishing. I don't imagine all those news sites that use that kind of quote mark are using LaTeX.

Voilã?

Anyway ....

• • •


flavoured condoms

I'm iffy about the damn things, too, but recently, studies have emerged suggesting unprotected fellatio is contributing (via HPV) to throat cancer. This is unfortunate, since condoms defeat most of the reasons I like to give head.

• • •

I admit I'm hard-pressed to think of a totally pointless invention. Rather, I simply look at the people who have uses for some things and remind myself that nature, while often mysterious, is not extraneous.

S.A.M.'s note on edible underwear, for instance. Hey, I agree. But, yeah, some people get off eating the underwear off their partner. Whatever. I think g-strings are ridiculous because I'm used to the idea that they don't even cover the vagina, and exist purely for aesthetics. But even that is a reason. And, hey, g-strings on men are even worse. (Trust me on that one, please?)

Anyway, give me some time. I'm sure I can come up with something.

http://www.cookability.biz/images/gifs/ILLEGAL_IMAGE_COPY.gif
LoL..electronic spaghetti fork..

http://www.hemmy.net/images/funny/uselessinvent01.jpg

Solar powered pocket lighter....

A pocket ashtray

[QUOTE=shorty_37;1784035]Here are a few:

Butter Stick

http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/4210/butterstickeq3.jpg


Duster Cat Slippers (while they run around let them dust your floors)

http://img208.imageshack.us/img208/5167/dusterslippersdu8.jpg

Food Cooler Fan

http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/6317/foodcoolerns3.jpg[/QUOTE

Wonderful items except I see the fan as being redundant. Surely the cat could be trained to fart on the spaghetti.

The synth banks that are supposed to sound like brass instruments (IE - trumpet, saxophone) or string instruments (IE - violin, chello)

What alternate dimension do you have to be from to believe they sound even remotely close to those things LOL?

[. Surely the cat could be trained to fart on the spaghetti.

Nice one Myles but I'm not so sure I want my cat's unpredictable arse only centimetres from my noodles.
And those cat-hair collecting slippers giving off a puff of furballs every time he lets one rip.
Spaghetti and furballs?

Nice one Myles but I'm not so sure I want my cat's unpredictable arse only centimetres from my noodles.


Why? Something wrong with your cat's arse?
Probably tastes better than noodles.

The synth banks that are supposed to sound like brass instruments (IE - trumpet, saxophone) or string instruments (IE - violin, cello). What alternate dimension do you have to be from to believe they sound even remotely close to those things LOL?They do an acceptable job with a string section, especially on rock songs with their ham-fisted dynamics. But the attack and sustain of an individual instrument is beyond them, not to mention tremolo. The essence of the first violin, second violin or viola section in an orchestra is to blend the slightly different pitches and tremolos of all the members into a pure and simple waveform. But the essence of a solo violin or cello is that each note has its own waveform, individually handcrafted to fit the spirit of the piece being performed, and moreover that each time any note is repeated it will not necessarily be crafted the same way--like a human voice.

The same is true of brass although the specific characteristics of the tone are different. I suspect a synthesizer could be programmed to do a decent job of a brass section, but there's not much call for these in popular music so AFAIK no one has bothered to try to simulate, say, a brass marching band. On my $150 Yamaha, the individual brass instruments are far less realistic than the violin or cello, which are only barely believable.

It does a better job on woodwinds, which have a purer tone, and percussion. Boy can I do a great imitation of a vibraphone, a steel drum, or Zamfir's panpipes. :)

Even a piano has a certain amount of variation between successive occurrences of the same note. Some is deliberate, some is the random effect of the complex mechanism. My friend who plays keys uses a PC in his rig and just bought the top-end piano synthesizing software. It was loaded by sampling each key eight times instead of one waveform per octave which is what the early ones had. Every time he hits a key he gets a slightly different random combination of those eight samples. The difference is on the edge of conscious hearing and it sounds eerily real.

The technology of music simulation is catching up.

Nice one Myles but I'm not so sure I want my cat's unpredictable arse only centimetres from my noodles.
And those cat-hair collecting slippers giving off a puff of furballs every time he lets one rip.
Spaghetti and furballs?

Whatever turns you on

But ,yes. I believe the decision of parenthood should come before you stick your pecker in and create a life.

Strange concept, eh?
You hatemonger!!!!! Don't you realize the female gets an extra 9 months after you stick your pecker in to decide?

What inventions do you see as totally pointless?


Democracy.....

The United States.

Nipple pasties especially the ones with jewels/tassels!

http://www.ginasgems.com/images/03_images/03_ruby-01.jpg

http://images.etsy.com/all_images/b/ba3/4f3/il_430xN.8161733.jpg

They're just nipples guys, get used to them! wtf?

If this were a thread about the greatest invention, I would have to say the greatest invention is nipples!!!!!! They're beautiful, and nourishing!

Has anyone mentioned the speedo swimsuit for guys? <shudder>

Has anyone mentioned the speedo swimsuit for guys? <shudder>

Don't know what to tell you on that one. Maybe it's one of those "right-not-privilege" arguments, but there are times when a man in a Speedo is a welcome sight for sore eyes.

My eyes are NEVER that sore. Well. they may burn after seeing a old fat man in a speedo.

I remember when I was in highschool. The guy that lived across the street used to wash his dads car in a speedo sometimes. Didn't hurt my eyes one bit, as I peered through the upstairs window through the blinds. lolol

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the memories! :o

I remember when I was in highschool. The guy that lived across the street used to wash his dads car in a speedo sometimes. Didn't hurt my eyes one bit, as I peered through the upstairs window through the blinds. lolol

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh the memories! :o

Was he an "old fat man" in a speedo?

They do an acceptable job with a string section, especially on rock songs with their ham-fisted dynamics. But the attack and sustain of an individual instrument is beyond them, not to mention tremolo. The essence of the first violin, second violin or viola section in an orchestra is to blend the slightly different pitches and tremolos of all the members into a pure and simple waveform. But the essence of a solo violin or cello is that each note has its own waveform, individually handcrafted to fit the spirit of the piece being performed, and moreover that each time any note is repeated it will not necessarily be crafted the same way--like a human voice.

The same is true of brass although the specific characteristics of the tone are different. I suspect a synthesizer could be programmed to do a decent job of a brass section, but there's not much call for these in popular music so AFAIK no one has bothered to try to simulate, say, a brass marching band. On my $150 Yamaha, the individual brass instruments are far less realistic than the violin or cello, which are only barely believable.

It does a better job on woodwinds, which have a purer tone, and percussion. Boy can I do a great imitation of a vibraphone, a steel drum, or Zamfir's panpipes. :)

Even a piano has a certain amount of variation between successive occurrences of the same note. Some is deliberate, some is the random effect of the complex mechanism. My friend who plays keys uses a PC in his rig and just bought the top-end piano synthesizing software. It was loaded by sampling each key eight times instead of one waveform per octave which is what the early ones had. Every time he hits a key he gets a slightly different random combination of those eight samples. The difference is on the edge of conscious hearing and it sounds eerily real.

The technology of music simulation is catching up.


Nuthin like a bunch of tech heads to ruin music,eh?

Was he an "old fat man" in a speedo?

Oh course not!! He was a Buff 17 yr old ;)

grillz. I was also gonna say those spinning hubcaps til I saw a wheel chair with them. That was cool.

http://www.cheapwholesalejewelry.com/shop/images/griilz.bmp

http://i269.photobucket.com/albums/jj70/WellCookedFetus/1183946663209s.jpg

This key on the keyboard

` <-----------

What the hell can it do other than take up space???

I couldn't agree more with this one! :(

'HEALTH FOOD IN MACDONALDS'..pointless