The year is 2003.........Tomorrow:

The info-mercial queues with the theme song........"Lean on me"......as the latest GPS piloted consumer "segway" model is introduced.....camera slowly zooms in from high above the city. Riders everywhere milling about like tiny creatures from last week's "Outerlimits" re-run.......as the camera pans downward into the majestic melee of the pseudo ruling worker class "hive" dance.......riders can be seen reading the daily paper, checking their heads-up holographic daily planners or watching cyber kitsch re-runs of "Total Recall" or better yet: ''willy wonka's chocolate factory". All of them being whisked off to their destinations without a worry or a care......but what's this?........the camera tracks slowly upward at first.........now gaining incredible, virtual neck whipping speed.........to the top of a newly built skyscraper. A man sitting. Watching it all below from the same vantage point as the camera at the opening shot. His face a bit disshevilled, his hands wringing about one another............he suddenly shouts: "SERENITY NOW"!!! And then........almost as graceful as the man in the instantly famous streaming video of the consumer segway model.............He dances right of the building! The camera races to catch up with the hurtling man and accosts him on the way down.......now falling parallel with one another......the man stares at the camera blankly and the camera zooms in on the man's wrist........his ID location mark is clearly visible........and then.......BLACK! Suddenly, light..........lighter..........blinding light now........The man wakes up........It was just a horrible nightmare! He glances over to his only friend........his confidante......yes, his scooter. He's home.........he's safe.........safe from everything.......fade out.......

P.S. the directors cut showing the man sleeping with his segway clutched in his arms in a loving embrace just before camera fade out can be viewed in "Trans-lobal" stereographic streaming video at the "geopoliticalsociotechnocurioforums.com" website.........that is if you have version 7.1 of Holodexter Directware by Mwahahaah INC.


P.P.S. I almost forgot...........the man falling.....is Kramer aka. Michael Richards............same hairdo........but whitening..........and in the director's cut..........he rolls over to fall asleep after his "nightmare" and gives his trademark cheeeeze smile and a thumbs up with his cute lil' segway clutched to his chest.......Giddyup. (insert Rod Serling theme here.)

TechStuf

what is "segway"? :confused:

These links may have been superceeded by now , but try them anyway


http://www.time.com/time/business/article/0,8599,186660-1,00.html

and then check out the videos

http://www.cnn.com/video/tech/2001/12/03/pr.ginger.demo.cnn.med.exclude.html

A definitly powerful mode of conviviality for all asunder !




think of skiing in slow mo with added features of reversing/turning on zero axis/safely executing in dangerously mild wet weather conditions and constantly maintaining@joggingspeed - a positive constant glider whispering through deep space

but you must maintain your thinking speed and





directionatalltimes.pcd2k01/11/7

water, waterways,sewage and drainage systems and even more surprising things. For enlightenment go to

http://www.surfwax.com

then type in segway and hit return

The segway has already got a major uphill battle in the form of the plethora of very capable electric scooters..........MANY with ranges easily surpassing his.......now who among us can't balance a two wheeled scooter ourselves.........heck I've seen 4 year olds that can only push those things a couple miles per hour and still balance fine.......What we have here in the Segway is an attempt at using a diversionary quazi utilitarian entertainment device to:

A.) stimulate and partially rejuvenate certain economics sectors...
namely that growing sector of Kamen and friends' wallets.

B.) phase in a technology that has been forcefully hidden from the public for WAY TOO LONG.....

C.) Public reaction "gauge" to the radical changes to come in post modern society.

remember, a guy as brilliant as Kamen has GOT to have more up his sleeve than just a two wheeled piece of Orwellitarian Art!


techstuf

For those of you that already own a two wheeled electric scooter.....why wait for Kamen's creation? I am currently test marketing an aftermarket device that can convert all existing two wheeled scooters into self balancing super scooters! And all without the hint of a patent infringement! This product is already in the public domain and although I suspect some of you may want to create your own, you can get them from me for the loooowww loooow introductory price of $999.99! They are hyper alloy training wheels! I got em off my nephew's first bike. Oh, don't worry..........he don't use em anymore so they are out the door to the first qualified bidder!


techstuf

What! No takers! They are a 3rd off of Kamen's asking price and use no expensive batteries!