Swinging vs Open Marriage

Are these different? I thought an open marriage was where each did their own thing and swinging was doing it together. My husband and I have talked about this (mainly cuz his brother and wife tried swinging for a time) and we decided neither of us could do it.
How can a couple do it? Is it sexual boredom or more than that?

 

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I agree with you on the terminology. I've heard of people having open marriages where either partner may go out and pick somebody up for some playtime that doesn't necessarily involve both partners. I tend to think of swingers as wife-swappers who meet another couple and trade for the night.

Either way, I think it would take some serious drugs for me to be able to do that. No matter how gorgeous the other girl was, I'd have the mental image of my wife getting boned in the other room, or right there in front of me. Not good.

We know a couple who swing, and they've never approached us about it, but sometimes at parties you catch them looking and know exactly what they're thinking.

Here's the thing for me: You can never unsee what you will see, unhear what you will hear, etc. What if it's better than it ever was with your partner? What do you do then? What if it works for one half of the equation, but not for your half?

Too many confusing issues that leave too many loose ends for me. That's why I prefer hookers and blow.

 

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If gay people can't get married, should these people be allowed to be married? And is polygamy an open marriage or swinging or neither?

 

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Polygamy is not an open marriage or swinging. It is a closed marriage...with one person having multiple partners, but he doesn't sleep around outside it.

Also, yeah. I would never swing or have an open marriage. No man is going to fuck my woman. The man who touches what I own is going to be hurt or killed.

 

Did you buy her from overseas? (I've never known anyone who got a 'mail order' bride, so I'm curious)

 

Orleander:

No. I don't have a mail order bride.

Amusingly: My friend has totally considered that after I showed him a mail order bride site.

 

I don't think I'd be jealous, I would be insecure. I would always wonder if I was as good/exciting as that other woman. I have to say, I think my husband would be for it as long as it involved only women and no men.

 

Bells:

Any woman in my life who considers herself romantically involved with me is, by default, my property.

I find it incrediably unmanly for a man to want to see his woman fucked by another man.

I can maybe understand male-female-female threesomes.

 

and there's my husband

 

Haha, "swinging" or whatever as in two women and two dudes if fucking gay. You've got to be a faggot to do something like that.

 

so how long have you been swinging Kadark?

 

Orleander:

It's the man issue and the whole "I'm not involved issue".

I cannot see a man who would be okay with his wife having a female lover.

But I can understand a man who wants to have sex with two women at once.

 

Orleander:

OH SNAPZ.

Good broadside, babe.

 

I know a few people who introduce a second woman into their relationship. They don't agree on the open marriage idea (because it's obviously different), and they don't accept a second man. I gotta say, to the third person, it looks very creepy.

 

I told my husband if he wanted me to have sex with another woman, I got to pick the woman. I told him I would pick my best friend, who is gay. That way he can wonder what we are doing every time we go out to eat together, go to the movies, or go shopping. And he could only watch from the doorway, with his hands on the door frame. No touching us or himself.
LOL, I'm not stupid. He said no.

 

Why would I ever "swing"? My motto is "if you can't swallow, then gargle". I would feel like an asshole if I couldn't dominate all of my partners equally. Of course, you didn't think about that, did you?

 

Oh no, I have no doubt in my mind that you are a dominate asshole. Wait...what? What exactly are you gargling instead of swallowing? :bugeye: Sorry Kadark, you have to explain this swinging thing to me in smaller words I guess.

 

There is a new TV show coming out called Swingtown, set in the 70s, which has a couple that do that. Its what got my husband and me talking.