While past research has linked early sexual activity to health problems, a new study suggests that waiting too long to start having sex carries risks of its own.

Those who lose their virginity at a later age -- around 21 to 23 years of age -- tend to be more likely to experience sexual dysfunction problems later, say researchers at Columbia University and the New York State Psychiatric Institute's HIV Center for Clinical and Behavioral Studies.

The study will appear in the January 2008 issue of the American Journal of Public Health.

Men who lose their virginity in their 20s, in particular, seemed to be more likely to experience sexual problems that include difficulty becoming sexually aroused and reaching orgasm.

A while back there were a number of users on here who would publicly lament their inability to get laid. I thought it might be useful to pour salt on their wounds. The scientists caution that more research is needed but I think their theory does not seem farfetched based on America's formal denial that sexuality exists and the psychological repercussions of this religiousness.

Interesting, how much of sex is in the mind.

*OW* my wounds are hurting.. although I'm not even 18 yet..

Those who lose their virginity at a later age -- around 21 to 23 years of age -- tend to be more likely to experience sexual dysfunction problems later
Yay. That leaves me about 3 months...

Methinks there's a chicken and egg problem in the stats.

I regret not getting laid until I was 17.

What is LATER? Is 30+ considered to be later??

I think anything over 16 is late.

In which country?

I lost mine at 14. I know this sounds sexist, but boys need to lose theirs at the earliest possible moment in puberty. All there is, is this obsession with what "it" is like before the moment and thereafter a sense of annoying disappointment. Don't get me wrong, there were times even after the loss of my virginity that I would have fucked a hole in the wall just to get off, but I wasn't so obsessed with sex afterwords.

I have heard similar stories from my straight friends as well. For boys virginity is a total burden. I don't know about girls, though the dangers and pitfalls for girls seems to be worth waiting for the right moment.

~String

Nope, sorry. NEWSFLASH: Women are just as horny as men. We just get slammed for admitting it. Heh, did you see what I did there?

Can you loose virginity with a 2D virtual girlfriend? Does that count?

http://www.ohgizmo.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/14_inbed_lg-custom.jpg

a gadget projection of virtual other in bed with you

I don't think its losing your virginity late that is inhibiting or causes sexual dysfunction. I think its your mind set. If your afraid of having sex for whatever reason and give it a negative connotation. You mentally inhibit yourself from enjoying sex. Chances are people like this may wait longer before engaging in sexual activity or they might just be stuck up like me.

I don't think its losing your virginity late that is inhibiting or causes sexual dysfunction. I think its your mind set. If your afraid of having sex for whatever reason and give it a negative connotation. You mentally inhibit yourself from enjoying sex. Chances are people like this may wait longer before engaging in sexual activity or they might just be stuck up like me.

stuck up like you? what do you mean?

stuck up like you? what do you mean?

Well the reason that I made it through high school with my virginity wasn't because I was saving myself or anything. It was because I thought boys and dating and all that jazz was a waste of time that would ultimately distract me from my academics. So when guys would ask me out I would always say no because I thought spending time with them was a waste of my time. Of course I did make a hasty generalization everyone's experiences are different and may have a lot to do with circumstance. Or that a person may be shy or prefer not to be in the company of others.

Well the reason that I made it through high school with my virginity wasn't because I was saving myself or anything. It was because I thought boys and dating and all that jazz was a waste of time that would ultimately distract me from my academics. So when guys would ask me out I would always say no because I thought spending time with them was a waste of my time. Of course I did make a hasty generalization everyone's experiences are different and may have a lot to do with circumstance. Or that a person may be shy or prefer not to be in the company of others.

well if I as a guy, 21 years of age...asked you out...would you go with me?

well if I as a guy, 21 years of age...asked you out...would you go with me?

Well as a girl who is currently not single I would have to decline. But I have gotten over my past stuck up ways and have learned that there is more to life than just school.

I see.

I have heard similar stories from my straight friends as well. For boys virginity is a total burden. I don't know about girls, though the dangers and pitfalls for girls seems to be worth waiting for the right moment.~String

Thanks for that, it's 11:20 where I live and you just made me get adrenal overload.

I'm not even going to dignify that piece of hypocrisy with a logical reply. It speaks for itself without anyone needing to demolish it with an argument. Go fuck yourself. I'm sick of attitudes like yours. Anything else? Maybe I'm not supposed to breathe, because after all men do that, so it's not ladylike?

What Emmz said

Nope, sorry. NEWSFLASH: Women are just as horny as men. We just get slammed for admitting it. Heh, did you see what I did there?

*kills self*

I'm not even going to dignify that piece of hypocrisy with a logical reply. I think you probably misread it.

I know this sounds sexist, but boys need to lose theirs at the earliest possible moment in puberty. There are cultures in which a boy losing his virginity too early si held to be "spoiled" in a sense - not that he loses status or marriage possibilities necessarily, but that he can never become wise or attain certain insights.

I'm still waiting to see how my generation plays out. This dysfunction correlation is too obviously full of dependencies in the variables to mean much without thorough vetting, and I have no idea how you would do that.

"God will forgive many things, but there is one thing He will will not forgive, and that is if a woman asks a man to her bed, and he will not come. I know, because a very wise old Turk told me" Zorba the Greek

"God will forgive many things, but there is one thing He will will not forgive, and that is if a woman asks a man to her bed, and he will not come. I know, because a very wise old Turk told me" Zorba the Greek

By "Wise old Turk", he meant his Todger.

However I read it, it was still a piece of hypocrisy. He's saying that boys should lose theirs as soon as they are mature enough, but girls should wait. Why? What's a 'pitfall' for a female is the same pitfall when you're a male. Why the FUCK is it normal for a man to be horny and to act on it, but if you're a woman you somehow degrade yourself by doing that? Oh, wait. Men need sex, women need love, any woman who thinks about sex other than in the context of 'love' is a morbid hermaphroditic creature with an excess of testosterone.

The study sounds like it's confusing correlation for causation. Of course there are people who are going to be undesirable to the opposite sex for their entire lives. The consequence of this is that if they ever lose their virginity it's going to be well after all the normal people do. These undesirables are going to remain undesirable and therefore they'll never have sex. Maybe their lack of desirability is directly connected to their sexual disability. Like maybe they're retarded or handicapped or just have really shitty health. Those things would affect a person's ability to perform and attract a mate.

So of course. This is exactly what should be expected.

The study sounds like it's confusing correlation for causation. Of course there are people who are going to be undesirable to the opposite sex for their entire lives. The consequence of this is that if they ever lose their virginity it's going to be well after all the normal people do. These undesirables are going to remain undesirable and therefore they'll never have sex. Maybe their lack of desirability is directly connected to their sexual disability. Like maybe they're retarded or handicapped or just have really shitty health. Those things would affect a person's ability to perform and attract a mate.

So of course. This is exactly what should be expected.
Why is this idea so hard to accept? There are critical periods in humans for learning various things.

Look at language, for instance. A child (say 5 years old) can learn any language perfectly and without an accent seemingly effortlessly. Many adults can never learn to speak a foreign language without an accent no matter how long they try. My grandfather, for instance, grew up speaking Spanish the first 17 years of his life, then he came to the US and has spoken English ever since. He's now 87 years old, has been speaking English far longer than Spanish, yet still has a thick accent.

Another example is vision. If a child has an eye that is not used due to it being crossed or having a large refractive error, he will never develop normal vision even with the best glasses if it's not caught before the age of eight.

Isn't it possible that the sexual development of a human being also has a "critical period" during which learning in that area comes easily and naturally; but once you're past that age it becomes extremely difficult?

That's a very good point, mandan. And yes, it does seem plausible. I didn't mean that what they were saying couldn't or isn't true. I was just saying that there are other ways to interpret those kinds of things and there can be confounding variables.

I was reminded of this time I was watching the news and they were talking about how some new study indicated that old people who did puzzles tended not to develop dementia by some age by some factor (like 5 times less likely). I was thinking to myself, "Well, that's kind of misleading." It doesn't imply a causal connection, even if there may well be one. There could be a whole slew of factors that cause both.

I was 20, and I'm fine...

Isn't it possible that the sexual development of a human being also has a "critical period" during which learning in that area comes easily and naturally; but once you're past that age it becomes extremely difficult?

Isn't that the case for just about everything?
You can't teach an old dog new tricks, as they say.

The study sounds like it's confusing correlation for causation. Of course there are people who are going to be undesirable to the opposite sex for their entire lives. The consequence of this is that if they ever lose their virginity it's going to be well after all the normal people do. These undesirables are going to remain undesirable and therefore they'll never have sex. Maybe their lack of desirability is directly connected to their sexual disability. Like maybe they're retarded or handicapped or just have really shitty health. Those things would affect a person's ability to perform and attract a mate.

So of course. This is exactly what should be expected.

But do you think that a study that a study would stand review and be printed if it had not showed consideration for all these other variables?

However I read it, it was still a piece of hypocrisy. He's saying that boys should lose theirs as soon as they are mature enough, but girls should wait. Why? What's a 'pitfall' for a female is the same pitfall when you're a male. Why the FUCK is it normal for a man to be horny and to act on it, but if you're a woman you somehow degrade yourself by doing that? Oh, wait. Men need sex, women need love, any woman who thinks about sex other than in the context of 'love' is a morbid hermaphroditic creature with an excess of testosterone.

haha, VI is one of these people who make everything about prejudice

check yourself for bias ;)

But do you think that a study that a study would stand review and be printed if it had not showed consideration for all these other variables?

Yes.

But do you think that a study that a study would stand review and be printed if it had not showed consideration for all these other variables?

It depends on what the conclusions of the study are. For example, on the study that I was talking about, the only definite thing that was suggested about the study was that old people who did puzzles were much less likely to develop dementia. If that's what the data say then there's nothing wrong with reporting it. However, when laypeople hear about stuff like that their minds automatically assume that puzzles prevent dementia, maybe even by a factor of five.

If, like you say, however, the conclusions are that doing puzzles actually prevents dementia, then yeah, they'd better have considered other variables.

haha, VI is one of these people who make everything about prejudice

check yourself for bias ;)


What exactly do you think I should have made of that post, then?

and can you not see why it bugged me? Does it not bother you that society constantly acts as if a sexual drive is a nonexistent thing for a woman, because we're only allowed to want love and not sex? Does the double standard not, just a little, get up your nose?

It depends on what the conclusions of the study are. For example, on the study that I was talking about, the only definite thing that was suggested about the study was that old people who did puzzles were much less likely to develop dementia. If that's what the data say then there's nothing wrong with reporting it. However, when laypeople hear about stuff like that their minds automatically assume that puzzles prevent dementia, maybe even by a factor of five.

If, like you say, however, the conclusions are that doing puzzles actually prevents dementia, then yeah, they'd better have considered other variables.

that's similar to what lobbyists do, but that' not science, is it? :)

what is the contribution of such article?

What exactly do you think I should have made of that post, then?

and can you not see why it bugged me? Does it not bother you that society constantly acts as if a sexual drive is a nonexistent thing for a woman, because we're only allowed to want love and not sex? Does the double standard not, just a little, get up your nose?

You misinterpreted super's post as being hypocritical, while he was just talking about well stablished social rules.

However you or superstring think or feel about the subject, teenage girls having sex is taboo, that is a fact.
The burdens he is talking about are social. This is not the opinion of a person, it's a colective cohersion.

Might get to your nerves, but it's a fact, and it's not going away.

And it doesn't bother me, because I'm not a repressed person.
Don' act repressed, and you wont be.

You misinterpreted super's post as being hypocritical, while he was just talking about well stablished social rules.

However you or superstring think or feel about the subject, teenage girls having sex is taboo, that is a fact.
The burdens he is talking about are social. This is not the opinion of a person, it's a colective cohersion.

Might get to your nerves, but it's a fact, and it's not going away.
Well, a fair social analysis but then...
And it doesn't bother me, because I'm not a repressed person.
Don' act repressed, and you wont be.
... you fall back on an individual solution. Is it really that simple, do you think?

Bad Varda. Naughty Varda.

Yes, naughty naughty Varda.

However you or superstring think or feel about the subject, teenage girls having sex is taboo, that is a fact. I don't think he was talking about taboos, exactly - or only.

More about consequences. Even if a girl is just as motivated for sex as a boy, and suffers the same consequences of not getting any (this is unlikely, given the role of testosterone in the psychological states involved), the risks of sex are greater for any girl - starting with a pregnancy before somatic maturity, which is physically dangerous.

Lesbian affairs, on the other hand, have no such contraindications.

Even if a girl is just as motivated for sex as a boy, and suffers the same consequences of not getting any (this is unlikely, given the role of testosterone in the psychological states involved)

AAAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*whiplashes her head against the nearest wall; feels better afterwards*

We do indeed have only very small amounts of testosterone, but we need much less of it to produce sexual excitement, because the brain of a female is more sensitive to it. Otherwise, we wouldn't have a sexual drive at all.

Varda, what makes you see me as repressed, and what does that have to do with anything?

VI, you gotta realize that he's talking in generalizations. We know you have a high sex drive and you could probably shoulder press iceaura into the sky. But believe me, he's not trying to piss you off. He's actually correct when he says that men have much higher testosterone levels than women and are thus driven to greater levels of aggression and sublimation than woman. In other words, the horniness issue is worse for boys than it is for girls. Girls have their own problems, of course, and that's not to say that chicks have it easy.

And I gotta agree with superstring. After I finally did it in my freshman summer in high school, I finally realized that I could relax a little. Granted, after losing my virginity I was still regularly horny, but it wasn't nearly as bad as before.

Varda, what makes you see me as repressed, and what does that have to do with anything?

ostentation

... you fall back on an individual solution. Is it really that simple, do you think?


She asked if it bothered me, I answered no and said why... It wasn't my intention to propose any solutions. I don't want to change the world, I can function in it. I don't want equality, I like being different and having my own obligations and rights. We've been through this in that other thread...

here is an interesting question.

As male sexual dysfuntion has been linked to heart diease does this link hold with late loss of verginity being linked to heart dieases?

Also as a fair percentage of sexual dysfuntion is caused by prostate problems or cancer (i belive) does a link exist between these and late loss of verginity

VI, you gotta realize that he's talking in generalizations. We know you have a high sex drive and you could probably shoulder press iceaura into the sky. But believe me, he's not trying to piss you off. He's actually correct when he says that men have much higher testosterone levels than women and are thus driven to greater levels of aggression and sublimation than woman. In other words, the horniness issue is worse for boys than it is for girls. Girls have their own problems, of course, and that's not to say that chicks have it easy.


It's not whether or not men have a higher sex drive that bothers me. I just get sick of hearing how the way people act is if it's almost unreasonable for a female to have a sex drive. It's like society decided that girls don't have noses, behaved as if noses don't exist on a female, and acted as if I was just being weird when I referred to my nose.

maybe you should move to Brazil
maybe

Ngh. Could you stop talking in perverted convolutions?

probably not

AAAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*whiplashes her head against the nearest wall
Damn. What's up with you and this issue? For very practical reasons, promiscuity is frowned upon more with females than males. That's a fact across every culture I've ever heard of.

Hell, females actually have a structure (the hymen) only present in virgins (thus "popping the cherry"). With males, no such structural change occurs. Does this not indicate that female virginity is more important than male virginity for homo sapiens?

Don't forget, for all of time (until the recent development of the paternity test), the only way a male could be sure a child was his was by having sex with a virgin. On the other hand, the female, seeing the baby come out of her body, is usually pretty sure it's hers.

This issue (male uncertainty regarding paternity) actually manifests itself further in that babies tend to look a lot more like the father than the mother.
In 1995, a study in Nature put the question to the test by having 122 people try to match pictures of children they didn't know - at one year, 10 years and 20 years- with photos of their mothers and fathers.

The group members correctly paired about half of the infants with their fathers, but their success rate was much lower matching infants and mothers. And matching the 20-year-olds with either parent proved to be just as hard.

The authors offered an evolutionary explanation for their findings: the phenomenon is a natural paternity test.

A father, unlike a mother, cannot always be sure a baby is his. If he spots a resemblance, the authors argued, he will know the child is his and will be more likely to protect and care for it, benefiting both mother and baby.

Another study, published in the journal Evolution and Human Behavior in 2003, seems to support this.

The researchers took head shots of a group of people and morphed them with photos of baby faces without the subjects' knowledge.

When they presented the subjects with the faces, the men were more likely to indicate they would adopt or spend time with the babies, male and female, who had more of their facial characteristics.

The women in the study, however, showed no preference for children with their features.

THE BOTTOM LINE Infants are more likely to resemble their dads. http://www.nytimes.com/2005/03/22/health/22real.html

Hell, females actually have a structure (the hymen) only present in virgins (thus "popping the cherry"). With males, no such structural change occurs. Does this not indicate that female virginity is more important than male virginity for homo sapiens?



Only virgins have hymens? That's not true, because I still had mine until my ob/gyn broke it a year ago. And some girls are born without one.

I read that study; a follow up study (published in a much less prestigious journal than Nature) concluded that the original was bogus.

If you have anyway of getting a hold of the paper (I don't, sense I'm no longer on a school network), here it is:

Do Babies Resemble Their Fathers More Than Their Mothers? A Failure to Replicate Christenfeld and Hill (1995) .

Evolution and Human Behavior , Volume 20 , Issue 2 , Pages 129 - 135S .
Brédart

Abstract: Contrary to Christenfeld & Hill (1995), we find that children aged 1, 3, and 5 do not appear to resemble their fathers significantly more than their mothers. We provide an explanation as to why this should be. In addition, we note that any father-child resemblance that does exist, while indeed better than chance, is far from overwhelming.


Their explanation goes thusly:
If a child DOESN'T look like its father, then the father won't take care of it. There would actually be stronger evolutionary force to look like a generic baby rather than any particular father, since if a mother cheated on the father, it would then be obvious.

In other words, while Christenfeld and Hill paint a nice, pretty picture, their data's pretty weak, and selective evolution doesn't work like that.

I read that study; a follow up study (published in a much less prestigious journal than Nature) concluded that the original was bogus.
The funny thing is, the article I posted specifically mentions your second study and says it supports the idea. But they only quote the part of that second study showing that men prefer babies that look like them whereas women like all babies equally.

Only virgins have hymens? That's not true, because I still had mine until my ob/gyn broke it a year ago. And some girls are born without one.Yeah, yeah. Focus on the 1% and ignore the 99%.

If hymens don't equal virginity, why would women pay thousands of dollars to have their "virtue" restored?
Like a virgin...
Women are having surgery to rejuvenate their love lives
Joanna Walters

When Jeanette Yarborough decided to give her husband a gift for their seventeenth wedding anniversary she wanted it to be special. Really special. She decided that conventional treats such as Mediterranean cruises, gold watches, cars, a murder-mystery weekend, or even a boob job just weren’t going to cut it. She gave him something much more personal — and painful. Her virginity.

Well, sort of. Mrs Yarborough paid $5,000 (£2,860) to a cosmetic surgeon to stitch her hymen back together so she could “lose her virginity” all over again and her husband would have that thrilling conquest at the grand age of 40.

He did, and after that very expensive moment the ecstatic couple spent a passionate Valentine’s weekend last year having the kind of sex that they had almost forgotten about. Now they are busy telling family, friends and strangers that it is the best money they ever spent and everyone should do it.

“Now my sister is thinking of becoming a virgin again for her 45th birthday to surprise her husband,” says Mrs Yarborough gleefully, as she sits in her modest family home in San Antonio, Texas, talking unabashedly about such intimate matters.

She is not the first to choose the operation — a hymenoplasty — to repair the fragments of skin forming the traditional “gateway” to the vagina, years after originally losing it.

Women have resorted to backstreet hymen repair for centuries in religions and cultures in which marrying as a virgin is sacred and losing your “maidenhead” before matrimony can mean shame, or even being put to death. But an increasing number of women such as Mrs Yarborough are now electing to be “revirginised” using modern techniques as a purely cosmetic or lifestyle choice, to “put the sparkle” back into their marriage or give their husband a surprise on the second honeymoon. http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/features/article734775.ece

Your... hang on. Having hymen means it's more important for you to be more morally inclined? If your kid doesn't look like it's dad he's not going to look after it? Only virgins are to be trusted with fidelity? It's bias to point out hymens aren't a big indicator of virginity but pointing out the miniscule amount of women who have their sewn back up isn't?

I just get sick of hearing how the way people act is if it's almost unreasonable for a female to have a sex drive. You are going out of your way to hear that when it isn't being said.

Regardless of a woman's sex drive, the risk/benefit calculation for actually having heterosexual sex is different. Do you disagree with that statement ?

Yeah, yeah. Focus on the 1% and ignore the 99%.

If hymens don't equal virginity, why would women pay thousands of dollars to have their "virtue" restored?

I'm not saying that they don't, but what I am saying that this is an ancient misconception about virginity. I forgot what culture it is, but when a girl gets married she is supposed to hang the sheets of her marital bed out the next day stained with blood to prove to everyone that she was a virgin and did not shame her husband, but almost all the women knew that even if she was a virgin the chances of her staining the bed were slim so they would give the bride sheep's blood to stain the bed with. I'll have to go dig up my textbook, but I believe it said that only about 30% of girls reach sexual maturity with their hymen intact. Myself included of course.

Just so inept people can catch up
here is the tried and trusted technique
used by the worlds greatest lovers for centuries.

stick it in
move it around a bit
squirt
go to sleep

Now you know all there is to know.
Always remember. Your body came from your mammalian ancestry.
Your mind is something new.

I forgot what culture it is, but when a girl gets married she is supposed to hang the sheets of her marital bed out the next day stained with blood to prove to everyone that she was a virgin and did not shame her husband, but almost all the women knew that even if she was a virgin the chances of her staining the bed were slim so they would give the bride sheep's blood to stain the bed with. .

That sort of thing was very common in most parts of medieval Europe, due mainly to religious repression/hypocricy, as if it never occured to anyone that a woman could have oral or anal sex and still remain 'a virgin'.

I just get sick of hearing how the way people act is if it's almost unreasonable for a female to have a sex drive.

The post that got you in a huff said or implied no such thing; what I think they meant was that young inexperienced women could get pregnant without desiring to or they could fall prey to unscrupulous men that exploit them sexually; there is also the social stigma attached to promiscuous young women, which rightly or wrongly still is or until very recently, was a fact of life in most world societies, especially in small local communities where nearly everyone knows nearly everyone else.

Damn. What's up with you and this issue? For very practical reasons, promiscuity is frowned upon more with females than males. That's a fact across every culture I've ever heard of.

Hell, females actually have a structure (the hymen) only present in virgins (thus "popping the cherry"). With males, no such structural change occurs. Does this not indicate that female virginity is more important than male virginity for homo sapiens?

Don't forget, for all of time (until the recent development of the paternity test), the only way a male could be sure a child was his was by having sex with a virgin. On the other hand, the female, seeing the baby come out of her body, is usually pretty sure it's hers.


Not all girls have a hymen, and most of us manage to open it up before having sex for the first time, how do you think we use tampons?

That's a bit archaic isn't it? It's not like you're actually trying for a child the first timeou have sex.

young inexperienced women could get pregnant without desiring to or they could fall prey to unscrupulous men that exploit them sexually

Any woman can get pregnant without wanting to, and how exactly would they 'fall prey' to said men? How does it constitute 'falling prey' in a way that a male cannot?

And as for the risk of pregnancy, is there not a similar risk for a male that he will make a female pregnant and end up paying maintenance for the next 18 years? That sounds like a pretty significant risk to me, and not one I'd want to take if I was a man. If you're a girl you at least have the choice of having an abortion.

And as for the risk of pregnancy, is there not a similar risk for a male that he will make a female pregnant and end up paying maintenance for the next 18 years? Outside of a shotgun marriage in some circumstances, the risk of his having to pay much of anything for any years was not, until recently, all that great in most places. Even less if he were very young.

And the physical risk of the pregnancy itself is of course negligible, for him - regardless of age and physical development.

The physical toll of a pregnancy in a body not yet fully matured can be serious, even with modern medicine. Back a few years, when our morals and customs were established, it was worse.

http://www.infoforhealth.org/inforeports/fistula/fistula3.shtml

Your... hang on. Having hymen means it's more important for you to be more morally inclined? If your kid doesn't look like it's dad he's not going to look after it? Only virgins are to be trusted with fidelity? It's bias to point out hymens aren't a big indicator of virginity but pointing out the miniscule amount of women who have their sewn back up isn't?

welcome to society

I'm not saying that they don't, but what I am saying that this is an ancient misconception about virginity. I forgot what culture it is, but when a girl gets married she is supposed to hang the sheets of her marital bed out the next day stained with blood to prove to everyone that she was a virgin and did not shame her husband, but almost all the women knew that even if she was a virgin the chances of her staining the bed were slim so they would give the bride sheep's blood to stain the bed with. I'll have to go dig up my textbook, but I believe it said that only about 30% of girls reach sexual maturity with their hymen intact. Myself included of course.

welcome to society, you too

Any woman can get pregnant without wanting to, and how exactly would they 'fall prey' to said men? How does it constitute 'falling prey' in a way that a male cannot?

women "fall in love"


And as for the risk of pregnancy, is there not a similar risk for a male that he will make a female pregnant and end up paying maintenance for the next 18 years? That sounds like a pretty significant risk to me, and not one I'd want to take if I was a man. If you're a girl you at least have the choice of having an abortion.

the woman will endure 9 months of carrying a baby inside her, will have majos body changes, will have a hormonal overload, will give birth, will need time to recover, will breastfeed

men can dip it in and hit the road, it's not difficult at all for a man to escape his responsibilities as a father, he can just disapperar

it's really very simple

Nope, sorry. NEWSFLASH: Women are just as horny as men. We just get slammed for admitting it. Heh, did you see what I did there?

Yeah, I got it. Made me giggle.:D

women "fall in love"

*makes derisive guttural noise at the back of her mouth*

Yeah, women fall helplessly in love whereas men fuck with complete detachment. Ngh, I'm suffering from stereotype overload. (Sorry there Enmos).

the woman will endure 9 months of carrying a baby inside her, will have majos body changes, will have a hormonal overload, will give birth, will need time to recover, will breastfeed

men can dip it in and hit the road, it's not difficult at all for a man to escape his responsibilities as a father, he can just disappear

it's really very simple

It's also the woman who can have an abortion if she wants to. And he can't just fuck off, the woman can go after him legally for maintenance.

*makes derisive guttural noise at the back of her mouth*

Yeah, women fall helplessly in love whereas men fuck with complete detachment. Ngh, I'm suffering from stereotype overload. (Sorry there Enmos).



You are either delusional, blind, or you have never been in contact with any other young woman before

Young girls are romantic. It takes a lot of heartbreaking to be jaded and cinical like you and me.

I've done my share of trying to talk young girls out of doing extremely stupid things for "love". And you really can't. You just can't convince a young woman in love that she is being used.


It's also the woman who can have an abortion if she wants to.

And you think getting knocked up in teenagehood and then having an abortion would just be a walk in the park for a girl, right?
This might strike you as odd, but abortions are actually traumatic.

And he can't just fuck off, the woman can go after him legally for maintenance.

So, you've never heard of a man who impregnated a woman and got away with it?

You are either delusional, blind, or you have never been in contact with any other young woman before

Young girls are romantic. It takes a lot of heartbreaking to be jaded and cinical like you and me.

I've done my share of trying to talk young girls out of doing extremely stupid things for "love". And you really can't. You just can't convince a young woman in love that she is being used.

And you think getting knocked up in teenagehood and then having an abortion would just be a walk in the park for a girl, right?
This might strike you as odd, but abortions are actually traumatic.

So, you've never heard of a man who impregnated a woman and got away with it?

I don't think I've been through anything that could be classed as heartbreak. Still don't do insane things for 'love'. Hell, I don't think there's such a thing as love, just shit loads of dopamine/adrenaline/phenylethylamine etc.

I guess I'm just naive and, as you put it, blind. Fair enough.

or you have too much testosterone in you, like you always say

Yup, that's me. Little Miss Hermaphrodite. :D (hence my username on photobucket)

so you're kind of proving the point

high testosterone can give people a sex drive, and lower the chance of the person falling in love, it's likely that young women will be an easy prey

... and they are, it's a fact

varda, then the answer is symple. Just find a chemical that inhibits the bodies ability to turn testostorone into estrogen. Of course i would wonder why as men have comaritivly LOWER levels of estrogen, men fall in love or at least into atachment as well

Hell ever been the first girl a guy has slept with?
Ever tried to break off that relationship?

Adolestent males can be just as obsessive as adolesent girls and can be taken advantage of just as easerly. Unfortuantly sociaty doesnt regognise that fact (as shown by the lower sentances constantly handed out to women charged with stat rape)

I think it's ok for boys to have sex. I know that when I do it my first time, I hope he has done it before so that he will enjoy it, rather then worry about if he's correct. A boy that has had sex before is more confident and I like confident boys.

I don't have sex, because one, I'm not aloud. 2, I'm a little scared how much it will hurt. And 3, boys value me much higher than girls that do it. I do admit, girls do like get.. You know... A lot, and all that, but I would never tell because from what I know, boys like girls who are propper.

Last year, my sister "she's in college now" she sucked a boy, and dad beat her up super bad. My brother is only 16, and he has sex a lot, and it's almost as if dad is proud of him. But I'm not aloud to even date.


But it's not just sex that's like that. My brother can swear, back talk, stay out late, do poor in school, or get in fights, and dad says nothing. If I do ANY of that, he'd totally murder me.

Boys like propper girls.
Girls like impropper boys.


Just my view point.

So basically you want a small number of girls to become total sluts so that the boys get their sexual experiences and you can stay a virgin?

2, I'm a little scared how much it will hurt.



You'll be fine. It doesn't hurt at all. Really. :)

Last year, my sister "she's in college now" she sucked a boy, and dad beat her up super bad.


He actually used violence on her because she got intimate with a guy?

Ohmyfuckinggod.

If I knew someone like that I think I'd fucking blind him with a screwdriver.

I'm sorry your father's like that...:( *hugs*

nah, leave the fun to the older girls

Lol, no, please don't think he's completely evil. He's rarely like that. We have to be like really bad for him to actually hurt us.

I don't want you to think he's evil. Just how how girls are raised to be propper, and boys less.

Lol, no, please don't think he's completely evil.
Not evil just stupid.

He's rarely like that. We have to be like really bad for him to actually hurt us.
Rarely?
You mean he's done it before?

I don't want you to think he's evil. Just how how girls are raised to be propper, and boys less.
By beating them up?
Very manly...

When I was younger I remember everyone making such a big deal out losing your virginity. They always talked about how special of a moment it was supposed to be and that is why you were supposed to wait until you were married. So I was expecting it to be life altering or something, but when I finally did it. It wasn't a big deal at all, maybe I'm broken, but what were they all talking about?

No, you're not broken, CutsieMarie. It's just not a big deal like everyone says it is. "Wait--you mean people told me something that's not true?!" lol, yep.

I wouldn't say wait until you're married, but wait until you fild someone worth sharing that experience with... You'l remember it for the rest of your life, so don't just spread your legs in the back of a truck or something.

I think your missing the point lol

When I was younger I remember everyone making such a big deal out losing your virginity. They always talked about how special of a moment it was supposed to be and that is why you were supposed to wait until you were married. So I was expecting it to be life altering or something, but when I finally did it. It wasn't a big deal at all, maybe I'm broken, but what were they all talking about?

Nothing could possibly live up to the hype that sex gets. I found intercourse to be a bit of a disappointment, but not making out. I was 22 before I got to do either, and French kissing a girl was the most intense thing I had ever experienced. I was expecting intercourse to be even more intense than that, but it really wasn't. But being good at doing anything usually makes it more enjoyable, and you can't expect to be good at something if you never do it.

Women don't have to be especially good for men to have an orgasm. But I can scarcely imagine how many women have been horribly disappointed by ignorant, selfish, fumbling teenaged boys. I imagine it can be much better if you find a considerate guy who is willing to listen to your guidance. Most of us are willing to make an effort. For me at least, it isn't all about being reciprocal. If I really like a woman, I'm certainly interested in pleasing her. Just the knowledge that I am doing so is reward enough, much the same as making a nice cat purr by stroking its belly.

Women are like meat:

They both need to be pounded to be tenderized.

Am I right or am I right?

Pounds PJ

and tenderises his arse.

:D

I wouldn't say wait until you're married, but wait until you fild someone worth sharing that experience with... You'l remember it for the rest of your life, so don't just spread your legs in the back of a truck or something.

But thats just it. Maybe because I didn't wait until I was married, but I think your wedding night would be special regardless of your virginity status. I just didn't think it was that "mind blowingly", "life alteringly" special event. I mean it wasn't a bad experience or anything, I don't regret it. It just wasn't as great as my elders had led me to believe.

S.A.M.:

Pounds PJ

and tenderises his arse.

Oh man. This is like a reverse Abu Graib fantasy.

Hottest. Post. Ever.

Women are like meat:

They both need to be pounded to be tenderized.

Am I right or am I right?

*stabs you to death, decorates the wall with your intestines* :D:D

so don't just spread your legs in the back of a truck or something.

I did it in a garden shed, hehe :D

I did it in a garden shed, hehe :D

<insert obligatory hoe joke/>
:)

Hahaha :D

No, insert something else!!!!!!!!!! :D:D

Fuck, my mind is so filthy.

Hahaha :D

No, insert something else!!!!!!!!!! :D

Fuck, my mind is so filthy.

Visceral... :eek:

In the garden shed.. ?

/intrigued

Visceral... :eek:

In the garden shed.. ?

/intrigued

Yeah. Me and my boyfriend were at a friend's house, listened to Deicide for a while and I sang, ok vomit-growled, along while he got more and more drunk, then he got to the point where he had to lean on me and it all went from there...:D:D

But thats just it. Maybe because I didn't wait until I was married, but I think your wedding night would be special regardless of your virginity status. I just didn't think it was that "mind blowingly", "life alteringly" special event. I mean it wasn't a bad experience or anything, I don't regret it. It just wasn't as great as my elders had led me to believe.

No it wasn't. But it was definately mind-blowing.

Women are like meat:

They both need to be pounded to be tenderized.

Am I right or am I right?

prime meat comes tender

And he can't just fuck off, the woman can go after him legally for maintenance. Good luck with that when he's 15. Or old enough to leave town. Or in jail.

World's full of single moms who are not getting "maintenance". There aren't too many 17 year old single dads stuck with the kid.

The risks are not evenly distributed.

Losing Your Virginity Later May Make you More Inept Sexually

Pretty ridiculous statement.

So you didn't read the OP?

Well i am not sure i understand what he is trying to say but neither does anyone else who responded.

I agree that "inept" was probably the wrong word to use, since the quote states dysfunctional problems; (but inept is easier to spell).

I just came in here to say that having been with seven virgins, they are a total pain in the ass and if heaven forbid something ever happens to my wife and I have to start all over again, virgins are an automatic deal breaker for me.

Women who have this idiotic idea that waiting as long as possible to lose it is somehow going to make it better are delusional, and I want no part of them.

For thousands of years men and women became sexually active in their teen years and like it or hate it, it worked. And then along came the Puritans and all of the sudden sex was dirty. We've actually devolved as a species since their influence took hold.

I'm not advocating teen sex at all, but the demonization of sex has led to more aberrant behavior than it has prevented.

As to the topic at hand, I could see it being a correlation, but not necessarily the cause of frigidity. Some women are just frigid, and of course most men are "fixers", but there ain't shit you can do about it when a woman has internal issues that obstruct her ability to let go and enjoy sex to its fullest extent. Trust me. I've been there.