Is sexual jealousy inappropriate?

In the age of birth control and casual sex, is sexual jealousy and monogamy in relationships something that has outlived its usefulness?

Should people disregard sexual fidelity?

 

Log in or Sign up to hide all adverts.

Not at all, the degree of companionship that one can have without monogamy is very little at all, I like the commitment part of a relationship...it makes me feel like I am part of a really great team.

 

Log in or Sign up to hide all adverts.

So your commitment is dependent on a monogamous physical relationship?

 

Log in or Sign up to hide all adverts.

I'm part of the AIDS generation. I demand fidelity.

 

Not just physical, but yes.

 

Not at all. Sexual jealousy is in fact a major premise in human psychology.

 

That should depend on the individuals that are copulating with each other. They should ask this of themselves as to what they should want .

 

S.A.M. as evidenced by the fact that we invented birth control (hell even the romans had condoms) sex for humans is NOT just about procriation.

Our kids take a very long time to mature even compared to our closest cousins. Chimps mature by about the age of 2, a human child of 2 is DEFINITLY not able to care for itself. So how does nature keep sexual partners together for the time it takes to raise that child? Well nature doesnt have DVD's books, playstations ect to hand out so it uses sex and most specifically the ENJOYMENT of sex to bond couples.

Incidently thats where the 7 year itch came from, 7 years is long enough for a child to be concived and to become semi independndent so that one parent could care for it alone.

 

basically we saw this scenario develop in that wonderful pocket of time in sixties - advent of birth control and the absence of AIDS and diminishing dominant social paradigms.

Would you describe the hippy movement as successful?

 

there's a variety of measures
quantity is one
quality is another

BTW baby boomers were more a product of post ww2 than the hippy movement

 

And they have ruled it almost into extinction.

 

Things could have gone worse. They could have gone as they had for the thousand years prior, for example, in Western civilization.

The free love folks were a minority, and they failed to take over - the organization men took over, the racial bigots and born-again Christians took over - But most everything worth doing was done by the free love folks.

Sexual jealousy has little to do with birth control, and it doesn't matter if it's "inappropriate".

 

Monogamy is an inspiration not a duty. Now how long that lasts is another story, when one is blinded by seduction from one person one is blind to all others no matter what their merits might be. There isn't anything more anti-seductive than a clingy or insecure partner. Possession kills the spirit, I would prefer a partner to be smitten not committed to some ideal of balls and chains. Problem is few people know how to create that kind of magic and fewer know the art of drawing it out for years at a time. Magic demands spaces between people not enslavement. I totally disagree with the de facto assertion that companionship is diminished in a polyamorous relationship. Infidelity means unfaithful right? Unfaithful to what exactly? Another's loins?

 

No, their trust.

 

Trust? I lose confidence in another if they are abusive or careless not because they shagged. Funny, I have never been in a relationship where 'fidelity' was stated as a criteria, if it happened it was natural and if it didn't that was equally natural.

 

If they're the agreed terms so be it, but most people enter into a relationship with an understanding there will be fidelity between both parties. That's why I say trust. If you want sex with other people that's fair enough but most people sneak around and have sex with other people behind their partner's back. It's similar to withholding informations is the same as lying. Being lied to creates mistrust.

 

You shouldn't go into a relationship thinking anything is 'understood'. Why would someone sneak sex? Is it because they are not allowed to be honest about who they are and what they desire from the person they are supposedly closest to? Is it natural or even desirable to demand from anyone 100% 'fidelity'? We stray with our minds if not our loins if the desire is there do we not? Fidelity is a social construct not a natural one and in some circumstances an over-rated standard of perfection.

 

Sexual jealousy comes about when we feel inadequate enough to command the attention of our partner and that's all it is.