Not a single day goes by without my thoughts wandering into the dark murky subject of dying. Well, in an everyday sense its less like thoughts and more like feeling; a feeling of ominous terror and complete vulnerability that swells churns, confuses. It's like clockwork, it usually doesn't get any further than awe mixed with nausea and emptiness. This is the same reaction my mind body has when thinking about a universe where nothing exists. Non-existence is unfathomable… This usually happens at nighttime, bedtime or in the morning, especially during or following an episode of sleep paralysis. Of course, contemplating infinities is an unequivocal mindfuck as well. Really, being conscious for an unbounded eternity is insane. It would drive a person insane. Then of course I can always remind myself that I don't have to think in these terms; especially because I believe God to be neither temporal nor spatial.

Several instances of sleep paralysis this morning in which I 'felt' hell (You have to have experienced SP numerous times to know what I mean by this). In SP a person still in a half dream state so their higher consciousness is not traumatized or disturbed by Sleep Paralysis but rather annoyed and fascinated at the same time. Which is why in a lucid dream this morning I was granted something in which I'd ambiguously requested for in recent days… A dream Sage!

I can only recollect two of the major question/answer conversations in my dream. The Sage wasn't present physically but in my head, we communicated telepathically.

[Keep in mind that in a dream state anything is believable even to a lucid being because they are seemingly not bound in anyway to the physical or literal nature of the waking state…]

<I>I ask him something about my numb senses. I'm near a set of rails wondering why the world isn't more realistic and vivid, (and he inserts a revelation into my cranium) I realize the world is perfectly pristine and real, it is I who need to be more receptive and vivid. The refining of my perceptions is just that. Perception is perception, it is a separate thing all together from the environment in a dreaming or waking state. Which in a way disagrees with general relativity by agreeing with it.</I>

<I>I ask him if I really wanted to…could I fly? He explains that if I really understood things I wouldn't need a body (which he never had since my first revelation). His point being flesh and blood deceive the mind into thinking in all the wrong terms. Or rather, we allow ourselves to be deceived</I>

These are quite literal and simple answers for a dream… Recently I'd re-expressed my interest in questioning dream characters about small and big things, and paying mind to the purpose and meaning of dreams. I believe this dream guide is a direct result of this request.

<I> I remember asking my dream sage why he would cause me a taste of hell (SP) just before bringing me these teasing revelations. I almost feel I shouldn't trust him but I do anyway. He is the dream itself.</I>

He didn't' give me the answer to this comment literally and I don't feel I should elaborate here…

In future dreams I plan to explore death more closely and figure out exactly why the point of death is death, and what it really means. This is all from an experiential level. I'm still unable to perturb away my reluctant belief that once my heart stops beating and my brain is deprived of oxygen that I will cease to exist in any self-aware state. I have my own opinions on the neurological/scientific demystifying summery of consciousness but this fact doesn't not justify filling in the discrepancies and variables with infinities. Lucid Dreaming is proving to be a unique and exciting means to explore these panoramic thoughts on an microcosmic scale. Though there is no guarantee I won't be told exactly what it is I want to hear.

(Tommorow I will transcribe the entire dream that inspired this thread and post it here)

Wow, I haven't been able to lucid dream as of yet, but the more I hear, the more intrigued I get, which is perhaps part of my reason for some of my current thoughts and actions. Most of the time my dreams tend to beguile me, almost as if they are against me. Some of the things you said relate very well to the way I fell although I don't even know if I have ever had sleep paralysis. I suppose one would know if they did. I sometimes think I might have it for a few waking moments, however it merely gives me a taste of things and fades. I do enjoy some of the answers your sage gave you. They do make sense in many ways, some might say that the "sage" avoids your questions with different answers. However I don't see why anyone would say that unless they were just skeptics trying to use anything they could to rationalize and debunk your statements to make themselves feel better and secure. I personally believe that your sage might actually just be your very own consciousness speaking to you in an un-perverted un-bias form. What I mean by that is your perception (along with everyone else's for the most part) is crippled due to the restraints put on it from your physical body and society focus on "the restraints" your body imposes on you. So it's a catch 22. Unless you have a lucid dream state in which your body no longer imposes on you, and you only have to deal with the imprint of society and "the rational" thought process they use, which gives you a way of escape. This hole or escape allows your conscious mind or "cosmic body" to manifest itself. My only word of advice (although since I haven't experienced lucid or SP) is you must have total faith in your sage or conscious mind. Your body is just another vehicle. You can take advantage of it and the experience of having one while the body lives, or you can pass it up. I don't think one or the other is more beneficial, just different to each other. Well have happy dreaming, please post more if ya can.

/peace

Feelings of death are mostly a sign there will be changes in your life. One way or another. For good or for bad, there will be some drastic changes.:) Guess you figured that out yourself by now, for I am pretty late at the Forums and replying here.

Humans always think the feeling of death in their lives will bring misery. It is not so. Most of the times it is a sign of change. In your way of living, in your way of understanding yourself and/or other humans. I wonder, what has changed in your life Fathoms?
Do you want to tell some more about it? How are you feeling now? Your Sage, or Inner 'Voice' explained it rather well.

Death is a Natural happening. Like the Seasons (that is to say as we know them now). Like humans.:) You start as a newborn baby, you grow up to learn, you grow old with wisdom (at least, that is the purpose) and in the end you'll die. To go back to the Cosmos and start all over again.

Never heard the riddle: What has 4 legs in the morning, 2 in the afternoon and 3 in the evening? - A human being: 4 as a baby, just started to crawl, 2 as an adult and 3 as an old human, walking with a stick.;)

Talk to you later...

Not a single day goes by without my thoughts wandering into the dark murky subject of dying.

Your self-respect is at risk by not doing it right the first time.

:rolleyes:

During a vision quest I "died" several times in one night.
It was the most intense and scary thing I ever experienced.
Reaching the boundaries of existance and feeling ones entire being desintigrate. Buddhists call this the lesser lights to my knowledge.
Another seeker I know has had this experience and also felt the same after effects that I felt:
The belief that one had travelled as far as one can. The belief that one has grasped the inner meaning of reality. That nirvana is in the non-existance on the other side of the boundary.

That is bull and serves to give up on life itself. The lesser lights say that non-existance is better than existance since it takes no effort.
To be or not to be... The desintigration process tells you you are tired and old. Time to unplug and cease. You have the choice.

My beloved lady and lifepartner witnessed me emerge from the vision with darkness in my eyes. She said I was scaring her and I got upset because she could not grasp what I had seen. The rest I had been longing for all my life. I could see that I could turn off myself and forever leave this maddening dance of life for good. I remember clearly the feeling of freedom and her fear of it.
The vision is a real killer, but I think it is a essential part of progress in ones spiritual growth. Only when one has seen the absolute option, on or off, one can choose to exist in freedom instead of under the illusion that on has to.

The thing one misses is that life is not a chore. Sure, it might seem like it is, but that is when one forgets to see the beauty and joy of being. It is all complete and a game to take pride in. One keeps on asking why, instead of asking why not, and looses oneself in the details when there is such wonder in the whole of the tapestry.

Life is art, and one has the right and ability to make fine and joyous art :)

Note: I am not talking about death of the body, but the end of existance on all planes. The soul saying thanks and goodbye and disappearing in a puff of etheral smoke.

Wow, I dunno how many of the other threads of mine some have watched or participated in, but you speak very close to what I see and believe. It seems that so many people however are hung up on life, not that it isn't something beautiful, but that they fear death so much, they fail to see the beauty in it as well. I feel that regardless if you die naturally or by other means, it is just another part of life, the whole cycle of things. Weather it's you who stops your life or another. I don't fear death, and I don't necessarily seek it. Although in many cases, some being way more obvious than others, I do every day. I wish for death like I wish for life because they are both seem to exist within each other. We live to die, but to die is to live. This is purely from my own experiences and probably seems rather obvious and rudimentary to those individuals that are more experienced than I, but we all come down a path learning many of the same things. I seem to have had significantly less experience than MuliBoy or Banshee, or many of the others. I do however find that through my own experiences I have been able to understand quite a lot from what little I have experienced so far. Nothing has felt greater than thinking of an idea or belief, and then later reading or hearing something and finding out that great philosophers and minds have had the same thoughts, and even wrote books around the subjects. It defiantly leads one to believe they are on the right track.... I hope this thread keeps going, because I am sure all of us could learn quite a lot from it. ;)

I have experianced sleep, or dream Paralyisis many times. It sucks! Its like being a observer in your own saga? THe other form I have experianced is brought on by some unknown, in as much as it plays like a movie and you have no choice but to watch!
Interesting, but I have not a clue to the why for? Somethings I dont want to know, but its like not having a choice but to observe it when it comes.

Any explainations for these two phenoms..?


bjl

I believe dream paralysis is caused by the brain wanting to keep your body safe by keeping your body paralyzed while experiencing a dream, to prevent you from running into a wall or something.

I've lucid-dreampt a few times. I haven't for awhile, but let me tell anyone who hasn't done it yet: IT'S AWSOME!!

I don't think a universal definition of dreams can be made, nothing in your dreams is symbolic to you the same way it is to the person next to you. A wild orgy could mean happiness to you and perverted-ness to the person next to you. Therefore death could mean anything or nothing.

Agree. Read a dream symbolism book, and while some imagery can have quite common meanings, it is impossible to write a guidebook for dreams.
Always had a deep fondness for dreaming. Earlier in life i preferred it to "real"life. Both are important, and being receptive to what dreams tell you is a great way to improve your awake self :)

I know this is bad, but many times I have wished for death, for someone to pull out a gun and shoot me in a restaurant or something. I know I have to wait my turn, but it's so intriguing to me. I want to know what's out there. I envy all of you who have had lucid dreams. I have been trying for one, but nothing has helped me so far. I agree about dreams, there is no handbook for them, they are different for every individual. Keep sharing your experiences everyone, this is interesting.

Yeah, guess it stays arractive to play with the tought of being killed or just to die. Don't have that specific with death though.

It intrigues me more to go into Black Holes, to show there is more to it then scientists think, or disappear in the Bermuda Triangle and find out what is there. And I am always fascinated by blenders and that kind of things, to put my hands in it and see what will happen.

Intrigued by 'darkness', or curiosity?:rolleyes: And you are right, there is no 'book' for dream explanation. Best you can do is look at your daily life and what affect your dream(s) have there. Though death is a sign of change, I stay with that. I died (and was killed) several times in dreams and OBE's, all that times, my life changed afterwards, a lot. Not always for the better...:(

Nothing strange in that. I think it´s much more common than ppl care to mention. Been there too. But I also think deathwishes also are a manifestation of fear of life.
It used to be for me anyway. Life and especially society didn´t make much sense to me.

I´m much better now (or much worse according to some) :D

Everyday is a good day to live or die :)